A Time For I

There are times to bend like a reed in the wind.
And there are times to act as a stubborn wall against the tide.

There are things that lie at the periphery of life. Then every “I hold like this” and “my opinion is . . .” stands in the way of harmony and peace. Every such “I” is the very root and source of evil.

But when it comes to matters that touch the purpose for which you were placed in this world, that’s when you have to be that immovable wall. That’s when you have to say, “On this, I‘m not going to budge.”

That “I,” that’s not evil. That‘s an “I” fulfilling the purpose for which you were given an “I.”

Likkutei Sichot, vol. 22, pp. 159–163; Behar–Bechukotai 5737:34.

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Worlds

Ego Preservation

By Tzvi Freeman

From the wisdom of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, of righteous memory; words and condensation by Rabbi Tzvi Freeman. Subscribe and get your dose daily. To order Rabbi Freeman’s latest book, Wisdom to Heal the Earth, click here.

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12 Comments

Avishai Barbourville, KY January 2, 2024

The personal self, aka ego, is merely made up of memories, our personal narrative, our likes and dislikes and so on. This I seems to be real, having individual, separate existence, but is not the actuality of who we are. (The word is not the thing, of course.) We take comfort in our seeming safety, we enjoy our pleasures, but when things go wrong, we attempt to fix them, make them like we want them to be.

On the other hand, G-d’s Self is the real deal. His Self is the ONLY Self that is actual and Real. My take on “Ehyeh Asher Ehyeh”, I AM what I Will Be, means each and every soul will develop into the perfect expression of the only Actual Self, of course after it is polished, so to speak. Reply

David Harold Chester Petach Tikva, Israel June 18, 2023

In common with my philosophy that we actually do two opposites together, it seems to me that when we find ourselves needing to stand up for our rights, we can achieve this not by being stubborn, but rather to comply in a way that actually is in an opposing direction but is too subtle for the compulsive demander to be able to see. That includes this reply! Reply

Rita Forbes Clinton November 18, 2022

🌻Good Morning 🌻

Perfectly stated and understood. Reply

Eleanor Skibo Pennsylvania, USA June 21, 2019

Everything in life has a time; G d developed a perfect time for everything we do and say and all we’ve to do is tap into that timing by staying in touch with him. G d will never let us down if we stay loyal to him. This is why it’s so very important to begin each day in prayer; we need to be sure we’re traveling down the correct highway before we begin our journey or we’ll either become confused or completely lost. Our clocks must be ticking on G d’s time and not on our own time. If we always remember to check in with G d first then we can be sure that all roads lead forward and not sideways or backwards. G d created us and he knows us better than we know ourselves that’s why he knows our plans before we even think about them. All we have to do is follow his map not our own and move in his time and not in our own time. Reply

Barbara Houston June 18, 2019

How do you tell the difference? Sometimes I struggle with that. Reply

Jay Silverman Delray Beach June 19, 2019

in response to Barbara:

Shalom Barbara,

If it is something that has to do with a positive mitzvah then you can sometimes bend a little bit like a reed. If it has to do with a negative mitzvah then you have to be an immovable wall. In the example in the article it seems to me that it is just better to say something like "our custom is to it this way" or perhaps "my opinion regarding the halachah is such and such". It should explained in a kind way about how you feel about something, however not in a demanding way so that it might upset others. Or it could be that you say something for the sake of peace. Joseph's brothers told him that Jacob said that he did not want him to hold a grudge against them. It was not true, however they told Joseph this for the sake of peace. Of course Joseph never did hold a grudge against them at all, and he explained to them that HaShem made it all possible so that he could take care of them all in Egypt. To avoid a sin we have to be strong like a rock against the tide. Reply

Anonymous July 17, 2017

I tried letting go of that I and ended falling in the wrong hands. But then again when I used that I.. I ended creating an earth quick.. Reply

Brenda Toronto, Canada July 17, 2017

From I Time To Our Time I time belongs to this world.
I need to perform my unique earthly activities and use my talents to live here.

More importantly, my I is here on a spiritual mission:
This world gives us time to learn how to enter the spiritual world. How to become part of something bigger than I.
In the spiritual world there is no I.
We all function as one interdependent system . For this system to function harmoniously, I have to cancel my I, my feelings of self-gratification, my negative judgements of others, my repulsion of losing my identity!
Then my corrected non-egoistic 'I' qualities become incorporated in others to produce the divine connection of all our qualities to perform the eternal function that G_d has prepared for all of us. Reply

Cabezudo Qro, Mexico May 29, 2015

An Islamist sect would also fit as an example. The phrase that bites is "... stands in the way of harmony and peace. Every such “I” is the very root and the source of evil." Do we always have to be harmonious and peaceful people? To me, that behaviour resembles an ant colony -every individual is working in perfect harmony and peace. Reply

JackBlack Kiev, Ur January 25, 2012

Confidence Issues This exercise seems to be very easy, but: where do we go to be sure? It seems that effort leads to somewhere "btwn a rock and a hard place". Hopefully we don't get squashed Reply

Anonymous January 25, 2012

incitement versus essence i just recently read that the yetzer hora ( evil inclination has two aspects:

The first is incitement, a habit which must be destroyed. It can be as important as say doing cocaine or awaking an going back to sleep cozily rather than going to a yeshiva class. Such incitements of the mind must be destroyed.

The second aspect, essence, is to transform the habit into something good/G-dly. Instead of cocaine, do charity. Instead of sleeping in , go to the Torah class.

I am thinking that the Daily dose is getting at this point. Incitement is to boast about the ego , look at me. Destroy that aspect. By virtue of the second aspect, essence, change boastfulness to humbleness or to pride as in proud to be a Jew.

The title could be I versus i. Don't put your ego ahead of all else. Reply

kelilah bakersfield January 25, 2012

Hi Can you please explain? Reply

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