Perfection

Perfection. That elusive phenomena. It eludes me, yet I desire it. Take something simple- like my tissue box. I can't seem to get the perfect kind. Either I get the kind that you have to stick your hand way down to grab a tissue when the plastic gets frayed, or the kind that right when it's opened you have to waste a bunch because they all come out ripped.

But seriously, don't we all desire perfection in our little worlds?

We want the perfect hair, clothes, body. Society and our culture these days don't do much to help the situation. On the contrary- it's in our faces- plastered on billboards and magazine covers.

"Look at her - she has the perfect body, the perfectly behaved children, and always perfectly dressed," they scream.

There's that word again.

That's part of the comparing that we torture ourselves with. The so called perfect lives of our neighbors and peers.

The truth is I can write about it - because I suffer from this disorder called perfectionism. Maybe you know someone with this disorder or maybe you too have it.

The need and desire for things to be perfect. Problems arise when they're not.

I wake up some mornings and glance in the mirror. A not so perfect reflection stares back at me. Face it - you're not as slim as you used to be, it seems to say.

Finally choose that not - so perfect outfit.

Take a walk through the not so perfect rooms- the ones that when there's enough money will get redone- to look more perfect.

Of course - post and print only the pictures where we look perfect.

But the real problems start when the need for perfection spills over onto one's spouse, parents or children. When we start to desire perfection in those around us.

Where does this desire come from?

Perhaps it stems from esteem. We feel that we're not good enough the way we are, we need to look a certain way - be a certain way. Perfect.

I read an article once that stated that the evil inclination of our days is esteem. Or lack of it. We tell ourselves we're not good enough - making it harder for us to do what we need to do, which in turn hinders our service to our Creator.

Let's flashback 5,770 years ago. G‑d was alone in the world. And then for six days He created, resting on the seventh. A perfect world. Enter: Adam and Eve.

Enter the snake and temptation.

Enter sin, imperfection.

Enter the struggle in our souls of good vs. evil. That is the eternal conflict within us. The one that G‑d desires. The one that when we triumph - is an experience of perfection in this imperfect world. And when we continue to triumph -one deed, one thought, one action at a time, we bring ourselves closer to the time when once again the world will be in the state in which it was meant to be- that of complete perfection.