Peace is a critical attribute among Jews. In Hebrew, we greet each other and take leave of each other with shalom, the word for “peace.” One of G‑d’s names is Peace. In the Land of Israel, the Kohanim bless the people with peace every day. In Psalms, we are told to request and pursue peace; in Proverbs, it tells us that all the paths of the Torah lead to peace. The Torah is the key to obtaining peace.

Here are a few suggestions for attaining inner peace.

1. Shalom and shalem (“whole”) share the same root. To achieve peace, we must first have inner peace and be whole with ourselves. You can’t be at peace with others unless you are at peaceI have no identity if I am not true to myself with yourself. And the key to that is to be true to your values and morals. Our soul is a fragment of G‑d within us, and it tells us via our conscience whether we are acting correctly; whether our choices are in tune with G‑d’s wishes. When we ignore it and do something we feel is questionable, we feel an inner nagging that disturbs our sense of tranquility. As Hillel said, “If I am not for myself, who am I?” I can have no identity if I am not true to myself, and no connection to G‑d if I distance myself from Him by transgressing.

2. To find inner peace, it helps to have outer peace. Find a place where you can be at peace: walk in a forest, by the beach, visit a planetarium. Experiencing solitude in nature and practicing meditation help restore your sense of self and perspective. Chassidic masters often recommended meditating in nature to regain equilibrium and reconnect to the Infinite. Also, when we see how vast the universe is our problems diminish, and we have a more realistic view of how frivolous many of our concerns really are.

3. Disconnect. Many psychologists have already commented on the damage wrought to the psyche and emotions by constant connection to social media. It’s much better to connect to your real “friends” in a more personal and direct way, and avoid the pitfalls of constant virtuality and potential animosity bred by anonymity. It’s also good to meet them in person, to have the one-on-one connection so many of us lack these days.

4. Radiate peace. In Ethics of Our Fathers, Hillel says to be like the students of Aaron (Hakohen), loving peace and pursuing peace and loving humankind. It’s hard to pick a fight with someone who is smiling at you, talking softly and moving in a dignified manner. Speak calmly and patiently without a hint of irritation. Pretend you are portraying the most gracious and patient person on stage. When you act, you eventually become the part.

5. Be at peace with the environment, which means respecting it. Don’t litter, take care to recycle. Don’t cut down or damage trees for no reason. And try not to pollute the environment.

6. Interpersonal peace begins with your family. Try to heal rifts and settle feuds. There are whole families that thrive on conflict, and there are families where you hardly ever see it. While you can’t pick the family you were born into, you can choose to opt out of the feuding.

7. Surround yourself with harmonious people. You become like the people you spend the most time with. If you hang around belligerent people, you will be belligerent. If you hang around calm, positive people, that’s who you will become. In every environment, there are people we can choose to associate with over others. Strive to be in the company of relaxed, peace-loving, responsible and positive individuals.

8. Give in for the sake of peace. Yeah, I know that’s very hard to do. Start with very small things, like letting someone else decide where to go for lunch or what to serve for dinner. Let someone else ahead of you in line. If you practice giving in for peace on small things, two things will happen: The bigger ones won’t seem so much of a sacrifice, and people will see you as an easygoing person and be more inclined to give you your way when you do insist on something.

9. Live in the present. Don’t hold grudges. Don’t worry about the future. HoldingLive in the present. Don’t hold grudges grudges doesn’t punish anyone but yourself by robbing you of the present while you feel irritated about the past. Worry doesn’t actually solve any problems. It doesn’t help in the future; it just sabotages the present. Take precautions and act responsibly, but don’t steep yourself in worry. G‑d’s got this, as He has got everything.

10. Don’t bite off more than you can chew. Some people can work at a zillion projects, have a million friends and a thousand time commitments, and thrive. Many people can only do things one at a time with few distractions. When you start to feel stressed, reassess and either say no or delegate.

11. Don’t be connected to specific results. If you try to control the results, you will put yourself and other people under pressure. Trust in G‑d. G‑d is our GPS. He points us in the direction we need to be going, even if it’s not where we thought. Accept events and recalibrate your response. There’s a difference between persevering and pushing. Relinquish control of all but yourself.

12. Take deep breaths. You can’t underestimate this simple technique for relaxing and regaining equilibrium. Breathe slowly, filling your lungs with air, releasing tension, negativity and stress.

Taking these steps will lead you to peace—peace of mind and peace with others. May G‑d grant us all peace, always.