When I tear out of a jam-packed supermarket with a tantruming toddler, I feel judged. When my child is fresh in public, or acts out in school, or purposefully misbehaves when the in-laws are over, I feel judged. And sometimes, when there is no one else around to witness my child’s embarrassing behavior, I still feel judged, except it is me judging me, for I must be the world’s worst parent if my child isn’t perfect.

Talk about jumping to conclusions. That’s like the man who sees a woman on crutches exiting the office of a famous doctor and concludes that the doctor must be incompetent, for if he was truly competent, the patient would be walking with no help at all. Never mind that just a few months previously, the woman was paralyzed and in a wheelchair, and with months of support and therapy, she can now move her feet and even walk using crutches. In fact, if she continues with the regimen, she will eventually walk completely on her own. But the man observes her in the middle of the process . . .

That’s how it is with raising kids. Kids take baby steps, both literally and figuratively. It is my job as a parent to continue to support the growth and education of my child, and not to feel down when it takes him time to develop. My child is in the middle of the process.

Thoughtstream: Today, I will recognize my child’s growth in a challenging area, even if he has not quite reached the level that I’d like him to be at.

(Adapted from Igrot Kodesh, vol. 13, pg. 174.; Igeret HaChinuch.)