Despair is the diametric opposite of everything in which we believe
—in other words: it is a denial of reality.
It is a denial that there is a G‑d who directs all of His creation, and watches over every individual, and assists each one in what he must accomplish . . .
I have faith, but my faith has been tried an tried over an over, especially during these last two years. Sometimes I just cry an cry out to G D, pleading to know what is happening, but then I remember G D is everywhere, so his presence must be here with me right now. I just keep on praying an praying for this dark cloud to lift, and it usually does. I will continue on to hold on with G D, in my heart, mind, soul and entire being and i know the light will break thru the dark. Reply
When one has all of life’s comforts and security, when nothing awful happens to someone then it is easy to talk about faith.
When everything turns upside down, innocent people are arrested, sent to prison camp to be worked to death or just shot on the spot where they stand all because they are of a different race, a different religion, all because a tyrannical government has taken vicious control then faith evaporates like the morning mist and no help comes.
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ב"ה
I need to add in a sentence or two.
'ה really wants us to be happy. Do everything positive that you can to make 'ה happy. Don't fight Him and go in your own direction.
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Despair because you know the truth vs despair because you don't- are two entirely different things. The truth does not set you free unless you demand it. Stop believing it and start knowing it. Reply
Denial
I guess that if the idea is that faith in G-d prevents despair, one has no need to despair and despair might as well not exist.
Even treating G-d as the Ultimate Reality should not preclude the existence of despair.
No need to reply. I am simply pondering on the topic.
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not yet despaired ...
I guess that i just don't get it.
On this DD we are from different planets. File under can't ' win ' em all where ' win ' means differences in no need of argument. Arguments in general only have losers and no learners. Of course in a court of law, arguments are the name of the game. By this we see that the word argument takes on different contexts. I suppose despair does too. Depression is a tough subjects and I suppose despair is too. One can have hope, for this emotion was counted upon by many survivors of the Holocaust. To me despair is the opposite of hope. Both are real. Both require G-d's help. If despair is a denial of reality, then isn't hope too ? Of note is that survivors did not use the word faith as much as they used the word hope. There is a popular book written by a psychologist who survived the Holocaust. Most, not all, survivors lost their faith. Where kibbutzim for survivors were set up, most were secular.
I am fine with your sentiments.
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Good point-if despair is denial, isn't hope too? Seems its ok to deny reality as long as you're denying it in a way that is comfortable for the happy people around you. Torah does not teach that sadness or grief is wrong. HaShem comforts the broken hearted, He doesn't berate them! Something is wrong with these insidious teachings against part of life's experience. That is why so many Jews walked away from Judaism. It is not a New Age "think your way to the reality you want" system. Stop teaching it as if it is. Reply
Dear anonymous The siddur is correct every Jew regardless of Nusach says this prayer before bedtime. I was confused and still am about the connection you were trying to make between the thought of the day and this tefillah? You know what I'm saying? Hope you are well. Reply
He said "it is a denial that there is a G-d who directs..." We can believe in G-d but do we really believe and live like He is in control of everything....EVERYTHING? Wheee....that is the difficulty. And all those around that hurt us? And does forgiving mean we do nothing to bring justice? What if what we must accomplish is to bring justice? What if this brings punishment to them? Just wondering..... Reply
Re: despair
"We look to G-d to help us through our despair."
Then you have not yet despaired.
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Re: Despair
Look outward and do something for someone and to G-d for help will give us joy, and it’s not denial.
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despair
I disagree. Feeling despair is not a denial of G-d. Where do you think this human emotion came from ? We look to G-d to help us through our despair.
Do we deny our despair even though it truly exists ?
Am i missing the context ?
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This is what it says in my Siddur.
Master of the Universe,
I hereby forgive anyone who angered or antagonized me or who sinned against me — whether against my body, my property, my honor or against anything of mine; whether he did so accidentally, willfully, carelessly, or purposely; whether through speech, deed, thought, or notion; whether in this transmigration or another transmigration — I forgive every Jew..
May no man be punished because of me.
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Then we have a different siddur. Reply
The Rebbe says, “Moshiach is ready to come now, we all must only do something additional in the realm of goodness and kindness.” Although G-d directs, we have a hand in creation. It is up to us to bring a Joyful Realism. Reply
dispair is when there is no hope left - but then that's when trusting kicks in - hopefully.............must rise above what is around us..... very hard to do sometimes.....and still smile? I don't know. There is a time to cry but when? Do people of faith cry or smile when faced with hopelessness? I think of the holocaust - it couldn't get any worse than that. How can a person look above in the midst of that? I don't know. I think I'll just look for someone who is despondent and give them love....hope. Maybe that is the jest of it all. Reply
Bedtime Shema The Shema at bedtime is for personal protection against premature death and to atone for wasted seed. It has nothing to do with I herby forgive anybody who angered or vexed me. I don't see your connection Reply
But if we didn't have the power to hurt each other we wouldn't have to say in the bedtime Shema, "may no man be punished because of me." This clearly shows that we do have the power to harm each other. Reply
maybe , in an important thought , such as this one,
it can , should specify, what he OR SHE, needs to accomplish
just for clarity, and personalisation..
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Very comforting! I do believe G-d does that in our lives. Shalom! Reply
This, too, Rabbi:
You once posted a thread here not too long on the same subject, and, in both cases,-
your commentaries came off as if the topics were personal to you, and you felt compelled to say what you did.
Depression and despair are not against G-d's directon, anymore then smiling all the time is for it.
The world is full of joyful appearing people who appear smiling all the time and yet are more prone to the yetzer hara (evil inclination) then the yetzer hatov (good inclination).
The most prevalent false facade a person puts on is the smile, a veneer of happiness, to hide that their intents lean towards evil more then towards the good.
By contrast, a depressed and frowning person is more likely being honest in their emotion, and can still be for the good.
I can sense, Rabbi, that there is something behind why you are posting these things.
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Who said that life is going to be perfect? We know since the exist of the Gan Eden, that we will have to work hard and confront hardships, while there are a lot of possibilities given human imagination, we should know that all comes from H'. Humans are built with many emotions ( including despair,) and those emotions serve us to deal with events and relationships. Yet, anything we confront, it will be easier if we remind ourselves that "Gam ze Ya'avor, ( this shall also pass! ) ; and keep going forward. That leads me to argue let us not be prisoners of the past- because past events are the main reasons of that despair! It comes to mind the life of Yitzhak Perlman: he ended up with a disability when young that probably caused him despair, but found a way to go forward. He is great example of how to confront life. Focusing on our strengths even when life is not easy. Find support if needed, and trust that H' is with us. Kadima!