If the person trusting in G‑d has a wife, family members, friends, and enemies, then he should rely on G‑d to save him from the burden usually associated with being involved with them, and he should make efforts to meet his obligations toward them, and to take care of their wants, and to do so wholeheartedly. He should avoid doing anything that will cause them harm; instead, he should engage in the means that will bring them good, and he should be loyal to them regarding all their matters.
וְאִם יִהְיֶה הַבּוֹטֵחַ בֵּאלֹהִים בַּעַל אִשָּׁה וּקְרוֹבִים וְאוֹהֲבִים וְאוֹיְבִים, יִבְטַח בֵּאלֹהִים בְּהַצָּלָתוֹ מֵהֶם, וְיִשְׁתַּדֵּל לִפְרוֹעַ מַה שֶּׁחַיָּב לָהֶם וְלַעֲשׂוֹת חֶפְצֵיהֶם וְלִהְיוֹת לִבּוֹ שָׁלֵם עִמָּהֶם, וְיִרֶף יָדוֹ מֵהַזָּקָתָם, וִיסַבֵּב עַל מַה שֶּׁיִּהְיֶה טוֹב לָהֶם, וְיִהְיֶה נֶאֱמָן בְּכָל עִנְיְנֵיהֶם,
He should avoid doing anything that will cause them harm. Meaning, he should avoid harming his enemies; rather, a person should show them the proper way of the Torah ( Nedar Bakodesh ).
Hillel teaches, “Be a disciple of Aharon—love peace…love the creatures and bring them close to Torah” ( Avot 1:12). [The use of the term “creatures” here is] as if to say that even those who are distant from the way of G‑d’s Torah and His service, for which reason they are simply called “creatures” (i.e., their sole virtue is that they are creations of G‑d), a person must pull him close with thick cords of love, and perhaps, through this, he will be able to draw him close to the ways of the Torah and Divine service. And if he does not bring him close to G‑d, he still has fulfilled the commandment to love a fellow Jew ( Tanya, Likkutei Amarim, ch. 32).
Instead, he should engage in the means that will bring them good. The Zohar states (I 201a): Come and see how Joseph acted toward his brothers (who sold him as a slave). Not only did he not take revenge by harming them, he acted kindly and nobly toward them. This (attitude) is the path of the righteous. And in reward for such behavior, the Holy One, blessed be He, will have mercy on you constantly, in this world and in the World to Come.
The Alter Rebbe, Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi, writes: When hatred rises in a person’s mind, G‑d forbid, toward another, or jealousy or anger or a grudge, he immediately removes this thought from his mind and does not entertain it. On the contrary, he prevails over his emotions, treats this person with kindness, and shows an abundance of love. Not only does he not take revenge, but, on the contrary, he repays the offender with good, as we learn from the Zohar ( Tanya, Likkutei Amarim, ch. 12).
In the story of Joseph and his brothers, the good and beneficial “path” of G‑d is apparent. The sale of Joseph, which brought him down to Egypt, was not merely intended to begin the Egyptian exile, which led to the receiving of the Torah, but his descent to Egypt was intended to alleviate the hardship of the Israelites: G‑d has sent me ahead to save your lives (Genesis 45:5); It was not you who sent me here; rather, [it was] G‑d (ibid. v. 8).
This truth of Joseph is the truth of every “hardship.” Although the good is not evident in all situations, it is nevertheless a plan that comes from G‑d, Who only does good. Therefore, every “offender” should be treated and repaid with good. Indeed, the commandment to avoid causing harm and promoting good is to friend and “foe” alike ( Sefer Hamaamarim Melukat, vol. 5, p. 260-1; Likkutei Sichot, vol. 5, p. 241).
He should teach them the appropriate way to conduct themselves, both in Torah matters and in worldly matters, which will benefit them in their service of their Creator. As it is written (Leviticus 19:17): You shall love your fellow as yourself, and as it says in the preceding verse (ibid. 16): You should not hate your brother in your heart.
וְיוֹרֵם אָפְנֵי תוֹעֲלוֹתָם בְּעִנְיְנֵי הַתּוֹרָה וְהָעוֹלָם לַעֲבוֹדַת הַבּוֹרֵא. כְּמוֹ שֶׁכָּתוּב "וְאָהַבְתָּ לְרֵעֲךָ כָּמוֹךָ" (ויקרא יט, יח), וְאָמַר "לֹא תִשְׂנָא אֶת אָחִיךָ בִּלְבָבֶךָ" (ויקרא יט, יז),
He should not do so with the hope that his favors will be repaid, nor to repay them for the good that they already did for him. It should not be done out of love for the honor and praise that they will give him, nor in order to rule over them. Rather, it should be done to fulfill the mitzvah of the Creator —to observe His covenant and His instructions concerning them.
לֹא לְיַחֵל הַגְּמוּל מֵהֶם, וְלֹא לְקַדֵּם אֶצְלָם, וְלֹא מֵאַהֲבָתוֹ בִּכְבוֹדָם וְשִׁבְחָם, וְלֹא לְהִשְׂתָּרֵר עֲלֵיהֶם, אַךְ לְקַיֵּם מִצְוַת הַבּוֹרֵא וְלִשְׁמוֹר בְּרִיתוֹ וּפִקּוּדָיו עֲלֵיהֶם.
To fulfill the mitzvah of the Creator. Love your neighbor as yourself is the explanation and understanding of And you should love the L-rd, your G‑d. When a person loves another Jew, he loves G‑d, because a Jew contains [a soul, which is] literally a piece of G‑d; therefore, when he loves the essence of a Jew, he loves G‑d ( Hayom Yom 12 Av).
For a person who performs their requests while having in mind one of the aforementioned selfish reasons will not achieve his own desires that he expected from them in this world; he will have toiled for nothing, and he will lose his reward in the World to Come.
כִּי מִי שֶׁתִּהְיֶה דַעְתּוֹ בַּעֲשׂוֹתוֹ חֶפְצֵיהֶם עַל אֶחָד מֵהַדְּבָרִים שֶׁזָּכַרְנוּ תְּחִלָּה, לֹא יַשִּׂיג רְצוֹנוֹ מֵהֶם בָּעוֹלָם הַזֶּה, וְיִיגַע לָרִיק, וְיַפְסִיד שְׂכָרוֹ לָעוֹלָם הַבָּא.
He won’t even be rewarded for his charitable deeds in the World to Come. He might have performed the various mitzvot of caring for his family and guiding them on the proper path. However, since he did so for the wrong reasons, he will not be rewarded. Additionally, he will not even be repaid in this world by his family members for the good that he paid them.
However, if his conduct in the above is solely for the sake of Divine service, then G‑d will help them repay him in this world, and He will place in their mouths this person’s praise, and G‑d will make him great in their eyes.
וְאִם הוּא נוֹהֵג בָּזֶה לַעֲבוֹדַת הָאֱלֹהִים בִּלְבָד, יַעַזְרֵם הָאֱלֹהִים לִגְמוֹל אוֹתוֹ בָּעוֹלָם הַזֶּה, וְיָשִׂים בְּפִיהֶם שִׁבְחוֹ, וְיִגְדַּל עִנְיָנוֹ בְּעֵינֵיהֶם,
Additionally, he will also arrive at his great reward in the World to Come, as G‑d said to King Solomon (I Kings 3:13): And I have also given you that which you have not asked, both riches and honor.
וְיַגִּיעַ אֶל הַגְּמוּל הַגָּדוֹל בָּעוֹלָם הַבָּא, כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָמַר הָאֱלֹהִים לִשְׁלֹמֹה "וְגַם אֲשֶׁר לֹא שָׁאַלְתָּ נָתַתִּי לָךְ, גַּם עֹשֶׁר גַּם כָּבוֹד" (מלכים א' ג, יג).
