However, with regard to matters pertaining to his enemies, those who covet his possessions, and those who seek to do bad to him, he should rely on the Creator, may He be exalted. He should tolerate when they embarrass him, and he should not take retribution from them according to their misdeeds. Rather, he should repay them with kindness and do for them any good that he is able to do for them. He should remember that, ultimately, any benefit that he receives and all harm that comes to him is in the hands of the Creator, may He be exalted.
אֲבָל עִנְיְנֵי אוֹיְבָיו וְחוֹמְדָיו וּמְבַקְשֵׁי רָעָתוֹ, יִבְטַח בְּעִנְיְנֵיהֶם עַל הַבּוֹרֵא יִתְעַלֶּה, וְיִסְבּוֹל חֶרְפָּתָם. וְאַל יִגְמוֹל לָהֶם כְּפָעֳלָם, אַךְ יִגְמְלֵם חֶסֶד, וְיַעֲשֶׂה לָהֶם כָּל מַה שֶּׁיּוּכַל לַעֲשׂוֹתוֹ מִן הַטּוֹב, וְיִזְכּוֹר בְּלִבּוֹ שֶׁתּוֹעַלְתּוֹ וְנִזְקוֹ בְּיַד הַבּוֹרֵא יִתְעַלֶּה.
If they cause him harm, he should think good about them, and he should suspect that it is himself and his previous misdeeds toward G‑d that are the cause of his misfortune.
וְאִם יִהְיוּ סִבָּה לְהַזִּיקוֹ, יַחְשׁוֹב עֲלֵיהֶם טוֹב, וְיַחְשׁוֹד אֶת עַצְמוֹ וּמַעֲשָׂיו בְּרֹעַ הַקְדָּמוֹתָיו אֵצֶל אֱלֹהָיו.
If they cause him harm. This person is not the one actually injuring him; rather, it is G‑d Who is injuring him, and this person is merely His agent. As it states regarding Shimi son of Geira, who cursed King David: Abishai asked King David why he allowed him to curse, and then asked for permission to execute Shimi as punishment for his rebellious insult. King David replied, Let him curse, because the L-rd has said to him, “Curse David.” Who shall then say, “Why have you done so?” (II Samuel 16:10; Pat Lechem ).
Since G‑d creates the world anew at every single moment, and He is the source of every single creation, it behooves us to conclude that when a person speaks, and in this case the words of curse uttered by Shimi, it is by the will of G‑d. Similarly, when a person is injured by another, that act was sustained by G‑d and by His will ( Tanya, Iggeret Hakodesh, Epistle 25).
He should think good about them. It is possible that this fellow is in the right and that you simply do not see your own faults ( Nedar Bakodesh ).
Due to his ego, the person will not only not see his own sins, but when he does see something wrong, he will rationalize his behavior. When it comes to another person, however, he is always sure to judge him strictly and hold him accountable. In this vein the Mishnah that teaches, “One may see (and condemn as impure) the lesions of every person, besides his own” ( Nega’im 2:5), is expounded to mean, “One sees the lesions (i.e., imperfections) of every person, besides his own” ( Me’iri to Avot 1:7; Likkutei Sichot, vol. 10, p. 25).
He should offer supplications to G‑d and beg Him to forgive his sins. If he does this, then his enemies will return to love him, as the wise man, King Solomon, said (Proverbs 16:7): When the L-rd accepts a person’s ways, He will cause even his enemies to make peace with him.
וְיִתְחַנֵּן אֶל הָאֱלֹהִים וִיבַקֵּשׁ מִלְּפָנָיו לְכַפֵּר עֲוֹנוֹתָיו, וְאָז יָשׁוּבוּ אוֹיְבָיו לְאַהֲבָתוֹ, כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָמַר הֶחָכָם "בִּרְצוֹת ה' דַּרְכֵי אִישׁ, גַּם אוֹיְבָיו יַשְׁלִים אִתּוֹ" (משלי טז, ז).
He should offer supplications to G‑d and beg Him to forgive his sins. The person must also be in a joyous and inspired mood and accept his difficult situation with joy, knowing that it comes from G‑d and that this punishment is for his benefit, to save him from greater anguish. For small aggravations in this world remove great punishment in the World to Come ( Tanya, Iggeret Hateshuvah, ch. 11-12).
He should not take retribution from them according to their misdeeds. There are numerous verses in Psalms that indicate that King David did ask for his enemies to fall. One explanation: It depends on the standing of the enemy. If he is of great sin, then it is permitted to ask for his demise. If not, then the aggrieved person should not pay him back; rather, he should be kind to him (Rabbi Yaakov Emden).
The Alter Rebbe, Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi, writes: Even those whom we are told to hate (cf. Pesachim 113b)—for they are close to him, and he has rebuked them, but they still have not repented of their sins—he is obliged to love them, too. And both the love and the hatred are truthful emotions, because the hatred is on account of the evil within them, while the love is on account of the good that is hidden in them—namely, the Divine spark within a Jew that animates his Divine soul. For this spark of Gdliness is present even in the most wicked of one’s fellow Jews; it is merely hidden. He must also arouse compassion on the Divine soul of the sinner, for in the case of the wicked, the spark is in exile within the evil forces that dominate the Divine soul, and this compassion will banish his hatred and arouse his love ( Tanya, Likkutei Amarim, ch. 32).