How a Father Acts

A Jew is instructed to give rebuke, as the verse commands: “You shall surely rebuke your fellow.” Nevertheless, you can deliver the rebuke joyfully, good-naturedly, and gently.

When Reb Zushe of Anipoli wanted to influence someone to better his ways, he would “confess” to that person’s sins, saying: “Zushe committed a sin… Woe is me…” When the person would hear Reb Zushe confessing – and crying over it, it would move him to repent.

Usually, the Alter Rebbe himself would read the Torah scroll in the synagogue. Once, in the week of the Torah portion of Ki Savo, the Alter Rebbe was away, so his son, the Mitteler Rebbe, heard the Torah reading from someone else, including the section of G-d’s fierce rebuke. Upon hearing such harsh words, the Mitteler Rebbe fell dangerously ill. He was later asked: “You’ve heard these verses read many times before. How come you never fainted?” The Mittler Rebbe replied: “When father reads it, I don’t hear anger.”

When a father gives rebuke, it’s never with anger, only love.