Chapter I

אני לדודי ודודי לי הרועה בשושנים

"I am [drawn] to my friend and my friend is [drawn] to me; he who grazes his sheep in rose-like pastures"1

The first letters of the four Hebrew wordsאני לדודי ודודי לי form the word Elul2 [the last month of the Jewish year].

Earlier, the verse states:3 "My friend is [drawn] to me and I am [drawn] to my friend; he who grazes his sheep in rose-like pastures."

Rashi explains this verse in the following manner: " 'My friend is [drawn] to me' Whatever He [G‑d] desires, He requests only of me, the Jewish people. Only to me does He say to bring the Passover offering; to sanctify the first born; to build a Tabernacle; to bring offerings. He does not demand such things from any other nation. 'And I am [drawn] to my friend.' Only of Him do I ask that my needs be provided for, and of none other. 'He who grazes his sheep in rose-like pastures,' G‑d sees to it that His sheep the Jewish people graze [receive their sustenance] in good pastures [in an abundant manner]."

We must understand the difference between the two verses [which, except for the order of personalities, seem entirely similar].

The matter is as follows: There are two ways in which an individual may be aroused to spiritual service: by being awakened from on high, or by self-arousal. Arousal from on high takes various forms. The verse states:4 "He devises means that none of us should ever be banished. In other words, G‑d gives man ample opportunity to follow the proper path of Torah and mitzvos. Even if an individual strays from the correct path, G‑d sees to it that he is provided with the opportunity to repent and make amends. G‑d thinks long and hard, as it were, of ways to save even those individuals who feel they have severed all connections with their fellow Jews.

Indeed, every individual can choose the manner in which he leads his life, as the verse states:5 "Behold! I have placed before you today life and goodness, death and evil; choose life." G‑d allows man to follow either the path of goodness (wherein a person enjoys both material and spiritual success), or the path of evil (which is a physical and spiritual death sentence). Ultimately, we ourselves are responsible for choosing the way in which we live. When, however, an individual chooses the evil path and descends, G‑d forbid, ever lower, until he cuts himself adrift from Judaism and severs his ties with the Jewish people, then G‑d in His infinite mercy sees to it that even this person returns to Him.

Sometimes this G‑dly awakening comes about through a dream, sometimes through a sudden memory, so that a person will "out of the blue" be reminded of one of his parents, or a friend from his youth. Such incidents may suffice to arouse passionate feelings of heartbreak and dissatisfaction with his present spiritual state. The individual will become contrite, and make an iron-clad resolution that from this day onwards, he will become an observer of Torah and mitzvos, break his non-kosher eating utensils, and sever his relationships with evil friends. [In a positive sense,] he begins to wear tefillin, eat kosher, observe family purity, keep Shabbos, and do all the other mitzvos.

This, then, is one way in which a person can be awakened to teshuvah and G‑dly service. A second manner of spiritual awakening is that of self-arousal.

People err6 in thinking that the sole purpose of teshuvah is to repent for past misdeeds. Indeed, [the truer goal of] teshuvah is to become better and more refined than one was. This kind of teshuvah comes about by contemplating the real purpose for man's placement on this world.

Herein lies the difference between the two verses cited at the beginning of the discourse. "My friend is [drawn] to me..." alludes to an individual's arousal to return to G‑d, facilitated from on high. "I am [drawn] to my friend..." refers to an individual's self-arousal to teshuvah and divine service.

In summary: Though G‑d offers us the choice to do good or evil, should a person make the wrong choice, then "my friend is [drawn] to me...," i.e., G‑d arouses the person to repentance through a dream or memory, so that even one who has banished himself from the Jewish fold will return. "I am [drawn] to my friend..." alludes to spiritual self-arousal, brought about by contemplating the purpose of man's creation.

Chapter II

Herein lies the reason why the first four letters of the Hebrew words comprising the statement: "I am [drawn] to my friend and my friend is [drawn] to me" form the word Elul, for the month of Elul is a time of spiritual stock-taking. During Elul, one takes stock of one's life during the past year, recalling things he should have done but didn't, as well as things he did but shouldn't have.

It is written:7 "Turn away from evil and do good, seek peace and pursue it." The Baal Shem Tov8 explains this in the following manner: Within every permissible object is found both good and evil; the material object itself is evil, while the divine life-force that animates it is good. The individual who utilizes any object must thus "turn away from evil," i.e., he should not desire the physical pleasure which the object provides, and "do good," i.e., desire to be sustained and helped by the divine life-force found within the physical. "Seek peace and pursue it," means that the person who successfully turns away from physical pleasures and instead desires the sustenance of the divine life-force should seek out and actively pursue the goal of "making peace" between the physical object and the divine life-force that animates it. [This is achieved by elevating the physical so that its desires are similar to the spiritual]. Indeed, this is the ultimate purpose of man's creation and descent into this world that he elevate the physical to the level of the spiritual.

The spiritual inventory during the month of Elul should take into account not only a person's deeds during the past year, but also his words. When a person speaks ill of another, he is in reality speaking about himself. The Gemara says:9 "A person should never speak in a manner that gives Satan an opportunity." That is, a person should not say something unkind about oneself. In general, we find that Torah expects an individual to be careful in his speech, talking only in a clean and refined manner.

For example, the Torah writes10 with regard to Noach's taking animals into the ark: "And from the animals that are not pure...." Now, had the Torah simply said "And from the impure animals," it would have saved a considerable number of letters. This comes to teach us that we should always speak in a refined manner. We find in various books of Jewish ethics the severe punishment an individual receives for cursing another (and conversely, the great reward an individual receives for blessing another).

[That the reward for blessing and the punishment for cursing is so great is] due to the fact that "Beloved are the people Israel, for they are called children of G‑d. It is an even greater love that it was made known to them that they are called children of G‑d, as it is said:11 'You are children of the L-rd, your G‑d.' "12 A father who loves his child will handsomely reward the individual who blesses the youngster, and punish the person who curses him. So too regarding G‑d's children, the Jewish people: he who blesses them will be well rewarded, while he who curses them will be severely punished.

One should guard against uttering a harsh statement even about oneself. The Baal Shem Tov13 explains the Mishnah:14 "And payment is exacted from man with or without his knowledge [of the debt]" in the following manner: "With his knowledge," refers to instances in which a person makes a harsh statement against himself. We observe that when one suffers, or experiences hardships from his children, or in matters of health or sustenance, G‑d forbid, [it is possible that] he will utter a harsh statement such as "life is not worth living," Heaven forfend. Or he may, G‑d forbid, say that rather than continue the life he is living, he desires the opposite of life, and other similar expressions.

"Without one's knowledge," refers to those instances in which an individual says of another that because he has spoken so evilly or has done such a dastardly deed, he deserves such-and-such a punishment. To speak in this manner is to pass judgment, not on the other, but on oneself. "And payment is exacted without his knowledge," means that though the individual is not aware of it, by so speaking against another he has unwittingly passed judgment on himself.

In summary: Elul is a time of spiritual stock-taking. Every physical object itself is evil, while its divine life-force is good. Therefore one must "turn away form evil and do good, seek peace and pursue it." There is severe punishment for uttering a malediction, and great reward for a blessing or words of consolation. The evil judgment we pass upon others is in reality judgment passed upon ourselves.

Chapter III

The teaching that "a person should never speak in a manner that gives Satan an opening," can thus be interpreted in two ways: not to speak ill of oneself and not to speak ill of others. Should it, G‑d forbid, come to pass that an individual endures suffering due to children, health or sustenance, he should not rebel [against G‑d].15 Rather, he should be aware that his suffering pains G‑d greatly.16 Even more than a father suffers upon observing the anguish of his child, G‑d suffers, as it were, upon seeing a Jew in distress, as it is written:17 "In all their afflictions He is afflicted."

Surely, then, the sufferings of an individual result from G‑d's mercy. A person should therefore examine his past actions and seek to repent.18 When a person realizes that his afflictions are in reality an act of divine mercy, he will receive them with joy. This joy will in turn change the suffering to revealed goodness.19 For we observe that what a person imagines to be suffering or pain, often turns out to be the very cause of his salvation.

The second instance in which "a person should never speak in a manner that gives Satan an opening" involves speaking ill of others, [for by doing so he is in reality judging himself]. One should, in any event, always think kindly of others, and always give them the benefit of the doubt. A person has no right to pass judgment on his fellow man until he finds himself in the same circumstances, as the Mishnah20 says: "Do not condemn your fellow man until you have stood in his place." Truly, one cannot know the vicissitudes of another, or how difficult it is for him to do that which he should be doing, and refrain from doing that which should not be done. Just as people are diverse in their intellectual capacities and physical appearance,21 so too are they different in their character traits, desires and emotions, and it is impossible for one to know what is troubling another.22

A person who possesses a keen mind and a considerate understanding can guess [and perhaps empathize with] the difficulties another individual encounters by comparing that person with himself. Every person knows full well that he possesses evil intellectual and emotional tendencies, gross desires and lusts. They are so great that they cannot even be guessed at by another. He alone knows how serious are his faults, and the amount of suffering they cause him. He is also aware of the tremendous effort needed to overcome his evil tendencies. He is therefore able to use himself as an example [of how difficult it is to resist temptation], and give his fellow man the benefit of the doubt.

As an act of common decency, one should always look upon others in a favorable light and think that their actions are good. This attribute of not speaking ill of others and always judging them favorably is a good trait in itself. There is, however, yet another reason for not speaking ill of others, for by doing so one casts judgment upon oneself.

Penance for the sin of speaking evil requires two things: There must be 'teshuvas hamishkal an act of repentance commensurate to and in accordance with the actual sin, such as speaking [only] good and consoling the heartbroken. The penitent must also cleanse and purify his speech through words of prayer and letters of Torah. Not only should his every utterance during prayer and Torah study be clearly enunciated, but he should also utter a multitude of [Torah] letters, thereby purifying his soul from the multitude of letters that were spoken sinfully.

The most appropriate time for rectifying the sin of speaking evil is during the month of Elul. Rectification of one's actions, too, is especially appropriate during this month, which is known as the "month of mercy." The Alter Rebbe o.b.m. quoted the well-known saying of the Baal Shem Tov o.b.m., that during the month of Tishrei [the first month of the year] G‑d provides us with sustenance [for the year] on credit. When Elul arrives, we must pay our accounts, and the manner of payment is through teshuvah. When G‑d observes that we desire to pay and are paying [our debts], He then forgives the balance. This [cancellation of the old debt] is achieved during the days of Selichos. Through the teshuvah done during Selichos we are assured that when Rosh HaShanah arrives, G‑d will again fulfill our needs for the coming year on credit.

This then is why [the first four letters of the Hebrew words], "I am [drawn] to my friend and my friend is [drawn] to me" form the word Elul, for Elul is the appropriate time for the kind of teshuvah by which a person arouses himself [to be drawn closer to G‑d through repentance]. This in turn serves as the proper preparation to being inscribed and sealed [in the Book of Life] for a good and sweet year.

In summary: "A person should never speak in a manner that gives Satan an opening." That is, he should not utter a malediction or say anything bad about himself. Even when things are not going well and he is suffering, he should not rebel. It is also forbidden to speak ill of another. Teshuvas hamishkal through a multitude of Torah letters rectifies the sin of evil speech. Elul and Selichos are a [time of] preparation for being inscribed and sealed in the Book of Life for a good year.