Kaddish and Other Questions That Make Me Crazy

by Sheldon Richmond

"Why do you ask those questions?", she used to say to me,

"They will make you crazy."


Where do souls go after you die?

Why did G‑d make us in the first place?

Does G‑d even exist?


I stopped asking those questions for a while

But then she died,

And I started asking them again.


Then I stopped when the professors told me,

"Those questions are for religion and theology,

We don't teach that here."


But the other day my brother died,

And I started asking those questions again

And even new questions.


Will he see my mother?

Why did he die when we changed his name?

Does praying make a difference to G‑d

Especially if G‑d is No Person?


If G‑d is No Person, then what is G‑d?

If G‑d is Beyond Everything, and without Limit,

Then what is G‑d?


Is G‑d Everything?

Is G‑d Nothing?

What is G‑d?


They tell me now what my Mother told me,

Asking those questions will make you crazy,


Are we alone in the hurricane without an umbrella?

And if we had an umbrella, would it blow away?

And would we become a wet leaf trapped by the aimless wind?

And is all that we can do is ask questions

And say Kaddish?


"Why do you ask those questions?", she used to say to me,

"They will make you crazy."