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Parenting Articles by Yaakov Lieder

Acclaimed educator Rabbi Yaakov Lieder, founder of the Support Centre in Sydney, Australia, that aids families struggling with relationship issues, discusses his ideas and tips on parenting.

12 Ways to Build your Child's Self-Esteem
As parents we have a unique, never-to-be-repeated opportunity to set up a "self-esteem bank account" from which our child will draw throughout his or her life...
From Nothing To Everything
When we enter into the communication out of "nothing," then everything becomes possible...
I'm Here Because I Care
Why is it that I can influence others, but I can't get through to my own children and grandchildren? Is there anything wrong with them or with me?
Ownership & Responsibility
What our children need most from us is not another toy or another vacation, but something only we can give them: ownership of their lives
How to Make Time for Your Family
“I can’t work any harder than I’m working now!” one busy father asserted. But maybe the trick is not to work harder but to work smarter.
Teamwork Parenting
"If I say yes, he will say no. When he wants to deal with the situation in a nice way, I want to be tough. Our children sense our differences and play us against each other..."
Tell Me What's Wrong
"I don't care what you think about me, as long as you don't tell me." Is this what your child, spouse or co-worker really wants?
Three Rolls and a Bagel
Johnny was hungry, so he ate a roll. He ate a second roll and a third, but he was still hungry. So he ate a bagel. Finally sated, he said to himself: "Stupid me! Next time I'll eat the bagel right away!"
Communication That Gets Results
Real change can only happen if we are prepared to give up our old set of beliefs about the other person
Believe like a Child
We would never tell a two-year-old, "Why, that's not how that word is pronounced at all! And what a way to walk! Oh, you'll never walk or talk properly." So why do we do that with our children's dreams?
"I get porridge for breakfast," complained the yeshivah student, "porridge for lunch and porridge for dinner." To which his friend student responded: "I get excuses. From porridge one can live; from excuses a body can die!"
The Sales Technique
Our job as parents is to sell our children to themselves. The first point of reference for a child's self-esteem -- or lack thereof -- comes from what the child believes the parents think about him or her
Four Listening Rules
One of the most important human needs is to be listened to and understood by others. The closer a person is to us, the greater the need. Your children will want to confide in you -- unless you're sending them the wrong messages
Adopt a Bubbe
Some families bring pets into their homes for the purpose of teaching children to care; but the satisfaction in caring for a human being is far greater and more meaningful
Help! My Kids Are Fighting!
If you are blessed with two or more children, chances are that they will fight. But what can be even more damaging, in the long run, is that you will be expected to act the judge
Three Parenting Hints
Love your child's mother, don't say "No" when you mean "I don't know", and what to talk about when your children are listening
Does Your Child Want to Go to School?
"Why is it that the parents whom I most need to speak with don't show up at meetings, while those whose children are doing fine come to every parent/teacher night?" My response was that her question is in fact the answer
Upward Parenting
Some children focus on all the good they received from their parents. Others focus on what they feel they should have received
Are You Pleasant Company for your Children?
Adam and Eve's children learned from them, by example, how a parent cares for a child. But they couldn't be an example to their children of how to look after one's parents
Talk Less
We often hear parents say, "I told you a thousand times not to fight!" or, "I told you a million times not to exaggerate!" Perhaps that's the problem
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