Dear Friend,

“What, you don't want to be my friend?”

No that was not my preschool-age daughter speaking to her friend, but a grown-up acquaintance of mine. He really wanted to know why I would not be his friend. So I explained to him that my only friends are family members. Huh, you wonder?

Let me explain: Every day I am bombarded with Facebook friend requests, mainly from good friends of mine. But I use Facebook exclusively as a means to share family pictures and videos with my extended (and very scattered) family. Yes, I want to be his friend, but his real friend. For my real friends, I prefer real interaction.

My preferred mode of getting together with friends is a chassidic form of socializing, called a farbrengen. People chat about their lives, spiritual ideas and Jewish scholarly subjectsm, and encourage each other. We sing soul-stirring chassidic songs, and everyone walks away elevated.

There is socializing, but we get something deeper as well. To paraphrase the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, of righteous memory: “When two people meet, something good must come out of it.”

Truth is, you do not need to be a chassid to have a farbrengen; we can all do it. And every conversation can be a farbrengen.

Dovid Zaklikowski,
on behalf of the Chabad.org Editorial Team