Berachot - Chapter Seven

The Sages of Israel were wont to follow many customs at meals. All these are included in the realm of mannered behavior. Among them:

When entering for a meal, the man of greatest stature should wash his hands first. Afterwards, all should enter enter and sit down, reclining on couches. The man of greatest stature reclines at the head of the company, and the person who is second in prominence reclines below him. If there are three couches, the man of greatest stature reclines at the head of the company, the person who is second in prominence reclines above him, and the person who is third in prominence reclines below him.

The host should recite the blessing hamotzi. When he completes the blessing, he should break bread. A guest should recite grace, so that he will bless the host. If they are all members of the household, the person of greatest stature should break bread and recite grace.

The person breaking bread is not permitted to do so until salt or relishes have been brought before each individual, unless their intention was to eat bread by itself.

One should not break off a small piece, lest one appear stingy, nor a piece larger than the size of an egg, lest one appear like a glutton. On the Sabbath, however, one may break off a large piece. One should break the bread at the place that it has been baked thoroughly.

The most preferable way to perform the mitzvah is to break open a whole loaf. When one possesses a whole loaf of barley bread and a sliced loaf of wheat bread, one should put the sliced loaf together with the whole loaf, so that one will break open both a loaf of wheat and a whole loaf.

On Sabbaths and on festivals, one is obligated to break bread on two whole loaves. One should hold both in one's hands [when reciting the blessing] and break open one.

The person who breaks bread should give a slice of bread to each individual, the latter should each pick up the piece with his hand. The person who breaks bread should not place the bread in the hand of a person who is eating unless the latter is a mourner.

The person who breaks bread should take the bread first and eat. Those assembled may not eat until the person who recites the blessing tastes [from the bread]. The person reciting the blessing may not taste [from the bread] until those assembled complete the recitation of Amen. Should the person breaking bread desire to honor his teacher or a scholar of greater stature than he by allowing him to take the bread before he does, he may.

Two people should wait for each other when [eating from the same] dish. When three people are [eating from the same dish], it is not [necessary] to wait. When two have completed eating, the third should also cease. If, however, one completes eating, the other two need not cease.

One should not talk during a meal lest a dangerous situation arise. For this reason, if wine is brought in the midst of the meal, each person should recite the blessing alone. Were one to recite the blessing and another to answer Amen while he is swallowing, a dangerous situation might arise.

One should not look at the face of a person who is eating or at his portion, lest he become embarrassed.

An attendant who stands before those dining should not eat together with them. As an act of mercy, one should allow him to taste each dish to satisfy his desire. If the assembled give him wine, he should recite a blessing over each cup, because his drinking is dependent on their desire, not his own.

Should one of the assembled go out to urinate, he need wash only one hand [before] entering. Should he speak with a friend and thus remain outside for an extended period of time, he should wash both his hands [before] entering.

If [the company] was sitting and drinking, he should enter, sit in his place, wash his hands [with his back turned], and then turn to face the guests. Why should he wash in his place? So that the others will not say that he did not wash his hands because bread is not being served.

Raw meat should not be placed on bread, nor should a full cup be passed over bread. Similarly, bread should not be used as a support for a plate, nor should it be thrown. The same applies to pieces [of meat or fish] and other foods that do not have shells - e.g., berries, grapes, and figs - because they will become disgusting.

It is permissible to cause wine to flow through pipes in the halls of bridegrooms, and roasted grains and nuts may be tossed at the bridegrooms in summer. This is not permitted in the winter, however, because they will become disgusting.

We should not wash our hands with wine, whether it has been mixed with water or not. Similarly, we may not spoil any other food or beverage in a contemptuous and derisive manner.

It is forbidden for guests to take any of [the food] that they have been served and give it to the sons or the daughters of the host. Perhaps the host will become embarrassed because all he had was what he had served and that will have been taken away by the children.

A person should not send a friend a cask of wine with oil floating on its surface, lest one send a friend a cask that is [almost] entirely wine with only [a small amount] of oil on its surface. The recipient may be [unaware of the cask's contents,] invite guests [with the intention of serving them oil,] and become embarrassed [at his inability to do so]. Similarly, any other activity that may cause a person who holds a feast to become embarrassed is forbidden.

After [everyone] finishes eating, the tables should be removed and the place where they ate should be swept. Afterwards, [those assembled] should wash their hands [as mentioned above].

[This practice should be followed] lest pieces [of bread] the size of an olive be found on the floor. It is forbidden to walk or wash over [pieces of this size]. If, however, the pieces are smaller than an olive, it is permissible to destroy them intentionally.

When water is brought to wash, the one who recites grace washes his hands first, so that the person of greatest stature will not sit with dirty hands while others are washing. The remainder of the people eating wash one after another.

Honor is not paid to anyone with regard to [the order of washing], because honor is not extended with regard to dirty hands, crossing bridges, or on the roads, with the exception of an entrance that is fit to have a mezuzah, and even then only with regard to entering.

After [the assembled] finish washing their hands, drying their hands, and reciting grace, the person who recited grace should recite the blessing over the incense when the incense burner is brought in. Everyone should answer Amen.

If wine is available, [grace should be recited over a cup of wine]. We bring a cup that contains a revi'it or more and spices. [The person reciting grace] should hold the wine in his right hand and the spices in his left hand while reciting grace. Afterwards, he should recite the blessing on the wine, and then the blessing on the spices.

If the spices were fragrant oil or the like, he should spread them on the head of the attendant afterwards. If the attendant was a Torah sage, he should spread it on the wall so that he will not be going out to the marketplace with perfume.

Although grace does not require wine, should one recite grace over wine according to the custom we have mentioned, [several conditions must be met:]
One should wash out the cup over which the blessing is recited on the inside and rinse its outside.
It should be filled with undiluted wine. When one reaches the blessing for Eretz Yisrael, one should add a small amount of water so that it will be pleasant to drink.
Conversation should not be made over the cup over which grace is recited. Rather, everyone should remain silent until grace and the blessing of the wine is concluded, and then they should drink.