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Chava Green

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Chava Green is a writer, teacher and perpetual student. She graduated with her BA in Women’s and Gender Studies from Rutgers University in 2014. She attended Mayanot Women’s Program and Machon Alta in Tzfat. She worked for over a year as the program director at Chabad at Columbia University. Her writing often focuses on the interplay between Jewish/chassidic thought and feminism.
By the time I got to college, I realized that the threshold for a guy to express his feelings was absurdly low. A text saying, “Hey, what’s up?” was the equivalent of a bouquet of roses.
"All my visions of the “perfect seder” had been dashed."
All my deeply ingrained fears and doubts smirked at the glorious opportunity to rule over my mind in a moment of weakness.
So many times in my life I had planned out my future, and so many times I had been handed the unexpected. It struck me at that moment that I was experiencing the hand of G‑d literally reaching into my life and changing the course of my future.
The pressure subtly built a reality around me that I could not achieve. If the dream of that success failed, then everything was lost.
Perhaps you can’t see it, so it takes a bit more faith that it is there.
I’m ashamed to say this: Today, I saw a man on the street, black and elderly, splayed on his back, his cane awkwardly wedged behind his knee, eyes half-open, not moving a muscle, and I just kept walking.
Before G-d made me, what was I? And how did I arise in His longing? Was I a dash, a smudge, a ray within the sun?
It was a heavy joy That overtook me Took my voice away Stilled the noise And no more was to be heard For quite a time I sat rocking Until the room emptied Until I was alone And quite occupied With the essence Of things. Can a mind be so full It stops In s...
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