Life’s a winding road. There are challenging aspects of life that we must accept but don’t fully understand. Death is one of them. It’s an inevitable fact that each of us has an unknown expiration date. In Parshat Chukat, we’re informed of the death of Miriam the Prophetess in a mere five words. We’re told that she died and was buried in Kadesh.1 The narrative is ambiguous in its utter brevity. In just one sentence, the beloved sister of Moses and Aaron is suddenly gone.

Immediately afterward, the people were desperately pleading for water. Herein lies a mystifying anomaly. Although unstated, there’s an underlying connection between these events. It was in the merit of Miriam that the Israelites enjoyed an ample supply of water throughout their long journey.2 Many years before, Miriam had stood guard along the river, waiting to see what would happen to her infant brother who had been placed in a basket among the reeds.3 That act of kindness and devotion was noticed on high. Later, G‑d made her the Divine conduit through which the nation could quench its thirst for decades. The people weren’t aware of this until Miriam’s miraculous well ceased upon her death.

Read: Unravelling the Mystery of Miriam’s Well

The Torah’s every word conveys underlying meaning. Kadesh, the location of Miriam’s demise and Israel’s complaints of thirst, contains the same Hebrew letters as the word kadosh (“holy”). This suggests a subtle textual message. At Kadesh, upon Miriam’s passing, the spiritual and physical thirst of the nation may have been expressions of the intense vacuum left by her death.

In response to their panic, Moses speaks out in bitter words: “Listen you rebels, shall we get water for you out of this rock?”4 In his angst, Moses calls the people morim (“rebels”), which in Hebrew is spelled exactly the same as the name Miriam. Only the pronunciation is different. Could this be a fitting reminder that they had just suffered her painful loss? Can we surmise that their emotional reactions were related to Miriam’s death?

The people lost more than Miriam and her miraculous well; they lost an opportunity. Unlike the national periods of mourning that the Torah describes after the deaths of Aaron and Moses, it appears that the nation failed to console and empathize with one another after Miriam’s death. The missed opportunity for solidarity soon morphed into contention.5

We each must make it a goal to respond with compassion to those who are suffering. Upon the death of a loved one, families sometimes are torn apart by unresolved issues. Anger and divisiveness can overpower love and reason. At such vulnerable times, we need to choose our every word with greater care and sensitivity. By doing so, strife will be avoided and peace can prevail.

In this week’s Torah reading, we also are told of the end of Aaron’s life. Just as Miriam’s greatness became fully recognized after her death, so, too, the people gained a new perspective of Aaron’s greatness at his passing. We are taught that upon Aaron’s death that the pillar of cloud, which guided and protected the Israelites since leaving Egypt, left them.6

Read: What Were the Clouds of Glory?

It was in the merits of Miriam and Aaron that the blessings of the well and the clouds were miraculously bestowed.

Their deaths represented the start of the transition from a supernatural to a more autonomous existence. The Kli Yakar explains that there were some at Kadesh who didn’t want to enter the Land of Israel. They preferred their miraculous existence in the wilderness, in which all needs were provided for. Once the water abruptly ceased upon Miriam’s death, they recognized how the status quo couldn’t continue. With Aaron’s passing and the disappearance of the Pillar of Clouds, it was clear that a transition was in process.

Living in the here and now, we may not fully appreciate the far-reaching contributions of another, nor can we completely grasp the void we’ll experience after (s)he is gone. The totality and true impact of someone’s life gains heightened clarity once it has ended.

Like the Israelites of old, life, death and the journeys in between challenge us. The Torah’s guidance illuminates our ways, especially along unexpected curves on life’s winding road.

Making It Relevant

  1. How do you respond when facing uncertainty?
  2. Rely on your faith in G‑d to strengthen you, especially when in doubt.
  3. Recognize that our reactions to grief reveal how vulnerable we are at that time.