What if I'm not in the mood?

Question:

What if I'm not in the mood to do a mitzvah? Isn't it better to do less of the obligations but with a fuller heart, than to fulfill them with an unenthusiastic heart?

Answer:

That depends on how you view life. If your life is all about "self-realization," then yes, it may make sense to focus more on where your inner self is at than what you're doing. But Judaism views life as a mission: we are here to make this world a better place through our actions. We Jews have always stressed deed over creed, and we don't allow ourselves the luxury of "waiting until I can do it for the right reasons," which is a subtle form of selfishness—albeit a more spiritual expression of selfishness than the standard version.

A short story to illustrate this idea:

There was once a wealthy man who was known for his philanthropy and kindness. No beggar left his home hungry and without a generous donation. Nevertheless, this man was plagued by inner turmoil. He felt that his charity lacked "truth"; it was the product of ulterior, subtly selfish, motives.

He traveled to his Rebbe, Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi (1745-1812, founder of Chabad Chassidism), and poured out his spiritually troubled heart. "Is it all worth it," he asked, "if it's missing the most fundamental ingredient of truth?"

Rabbi Schneur Zalman responded: "But the hungry man you've fed is 'truly' not hungry now!"

There was a teacher who told the Lubavitcher Rebbe that he's taking a break from his job to devote some time to "find himself" and "figure out what its all about." The rebbe's response was: And what about your students? What should they be deprived of what you can give them because you're looking for yourself?

On the other hand, it is certainly a worthy and important goal to do things "with all our heart," as we say in the Shema. But when facing the choice between doing something without feeling or not doing it at all—just do it!

Click here for an inspiring article on this vexing issue. And also check out the articles in our knowledge base on the topic of Action; Deed.

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7 Comments

blah blah QLD, Australia August 16, 2011

blah Really good article. Really good moral. Thanks. Reply

Rabbi Moshe Goldman Waterloo, ON May 11, 2011

To Yoni Thank you for taking the time to comment and share your thoughts.

If you look closely at the question, it reads "Isn't it better to do less of the obligations but with a fuller heart, than to fulfill them with an unenthusiastic heart?"

That's very different from a question that would ask "I am unhappy with my performance of Mitzvot. I wish I could really feel a sincere sense of love when I light Shabbat candles. How can I achieve this?"

That difference is why I worded the response the way I did.

You will also notice that the usage of the term selfishness was preceded by the word "subtle". That's what this is all about - the subtleties in our relationship with Hashem. Reply

Yoni K Bergen coutny, Nj May 10, 2011

To the Author Calling someone selfish for yearning to do things truthfully is lazy on the part of the writer. You should reword those couple of lines because It is a little derogatory, and You should aim to lift up the reader, not G-d forbid the opposite. Reply

Anonymous Commack, NY December 20, 2009

Is it really a Mitzvah? I was faced with a dilema about whether it should be called a mitzvah if you do a good deed without a full heart. I discussed this with a close friend and she said it was. She said that maybe it was a bigger mitzvah if you do it, even though you didn't want to. The more I thought about it I realized that maybe she was right. As long as you do it without expecting anything in return and the person you help doesn't know that you really didn't want to help, it is still a mitzvah. Reply

sara channa eisenmann jerusalem December 4, 2009

what if I am not in the mood? Some person told me that I did mitzvot for the wrong reasons.Well,it is true that I didn't know too much about Judaism,not more than I could count on one hand-literary-but I thought,and still do,that to do good is a lot of fun,even when out of money,to find other ways to do something for others.But:"you shall not have fun!Don't you know how a serious business it is to do a mitzvah?I did, a sort of.
The other wrong reason<I was told was I found ,and still do-that the only way to cope with the horrors of the past(I am a survivor of Terezin,Birkenau,and Mathausen)is to do good for others. i cannot tell you how it felt to be told this,the only thing which comforted me was when my Rav told me that the poor people I helped,didn't care why I did stuff,only the results of it...So I am continuing to do chessed,whatever mood I am in personally...and it is still a lot of fun!!!! Reply

danny June 6, 2009

agreed i agree with both the rabbi and daniel day. daniel, i had never thought about this but it makes sense. i hate doing shacharis/tefilin but just doing even without enthusiasm it is still better than not. Reply

Shlomo Richard Daniel Day North Port, Fl May 19, 2008

Assiyah! Hello Rebbe,
What I have experienced is that if one does one will feel like doing more often than if one does not do when one does not feel like doing. Reply

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