Question:

I am in my thirties, a single male who has hopes of having a wife, a loving relationship and children. As I get older though, I hear more and more grumbling from men about how miserable and burdensome marriage is. When I ask men about marriage, a sigh of resignation comes over them, their eyes glaze, and they say, "It's hard work!" Half of the shul kiddush jokes are from male congregants about the burden of being married.

On the other hand, women always seem much more upbeat about marriage. Do they really know what their husbands are experiencing. Is it really such a grind?

Answer:

Here's my advice: Google marriage and longevity. You'll find many fascinating studies. It turns out that, for a man, being married is a more significant factor in health and longevity than income—so significant, that it outweighs the negative factor of smoking.

Yes, everyone loves to kvetch. It's the nature of man to never be satisfied. And even the best of marriages is not heaven. But take a look at the confusion and dullness that strikes any of those men when their wife leaves town for a few days.

Trust the Torah: "It is not good that a man be alone." The game of life is full of risks. If you don't want to take the risks, why bother with the game?