Words mean a lot when they are sincere.

Most men don’t talk much, and among guys that is the way we prefer it. We don’t care to talk about our feelings. We don’t care to be recognized for who we are, but for our accomplishments. For men, not saying anything means that everything is just grand.

For women, not saying anything leaves a void that they fill with questions. They mentally beat themselves up, thinking of every negative possibility. Needless to say, this makes them unhappy.

This does not mean you have to talk a lot. But some things are important to say.

Here are some things you should share with your wife.

1) Tell her how you feel about her.

Most men love their wives. But it isn’t in our nature to share our feelings. She is aching to know how you feel about her, and though you told her a week ago and nothing has changed, she is already thinking negative thoughts.

Think about it before you tell her, don’t just say meaningless words. Be creative. Find new ways to tell her how you feel about her. Saying the exact same thing for 40 years is not the way to go about it.

2) Tell her how well she is doing.

She wants to know if she is a good wife and a good mother. Don’t focus on the negative. She already has enough negative thoughts about herself. Focus on the positive. Remind her of all she does for you and for the family. When you see her do something that shows that she is a good wife or mother, point it out and let her know that you appreciate her.

3) Notice and compliment.

For women, who they are is extremely important. Therefore, their feelings, their dress, their talents and their abilities are of tremendous importance, as they are expressions of who they are.

Complimenting what they do, their creativity, how they look or what they are wearing validates their sense of self.

Even more important than all Love her for who she is, and not for what she does for you this is her inner beauty, her inner strengths, her brain and her heart. As you get to know her, and you see how incredible she is on the inside, make sure you compliment her inner self. If you notice only her outside, her respect for you will begin to wane. Notice her for who she is as a person. You have to respect and honor her for who she is.

This is so important. You have to love her for who she is, and not for what she does for you. When you love her for who she is, she will feel good when she does things for you. When you love her for what she does for you, she will feel used.

Now, how to say it.

The main thing is to say it, but being creative will make it mean so much more.

Speaking and texting is good, but writing a note or a letter is special and endearing. So use all these modes of communication: speak and text often, write notes when you can, and every once in a while, write her a letter.

A letter, whether written by hand, typed or emailed, will give her something to read and reread, and it gives you the ability to think about what you are saying and to be accurate. Because you took the time to write it, it will mean so much to her. You should even consider making letter-writing a part of your routine—once a week, once a month, before a holiday, etc. If you do, she will wait for your letter with joyful anticipation.

(Now that I am unable to speak, I started writing my wife letters every Friday. I now see the value of writing letters over simply talking.)

Of course. there are many other things that you should share with your wife. These are just some of the important things. Remember, the main thing is not the way you choose to say it, but that you say it.

It is my hope that you put these tips to the test, and that that this contributes to your wife’s happiness. Her happiness will surely contribute to your happiness.

Happy wife=happy life.