Shulchan Aruch: Chapter 73 - How One who Sleeps [in Same Bed] as his Wife or Sons should Conduct Himself [with Regard to Reciting Shema]

SECTION 73 How One who Sleeps [in the Same Bed] as his Wife or Sons should Conduct Himself [with Regard to Reciting the Shema]. (1–3)

1 If two people sleep naked under the same cover and their bodies touch, neither of them may recite the Shema1 unless a covering separates them from the loins downward,2 because the touch of their bodies below the loins would arouse erotic thoughts during the recitation. This is forbidden,3 because of [the directive]4 “that He see no nakedness among you.” [The prohibition implied by] the verse applies only to one’s own nakedness when exposed and visible, as will be explained.5 However, in Rabbinic Law [its scope is expanded, so that the rationale given by the preceding verse], “because G‑d, your L‑rd, proceeds in the midst of your camp,” [applies wherever G‑d accompanies us; i.e.,] whenever one is engaged in the recitation of the Shema or Shemoneh Esreh or in Torah study, as explained in sec. 74[:1]. And [the term] ervah, “nakedness,” is interpreted as referring to anything that would arouse erotic thoughts, as in the teaching [of the Sages],6 “An [uncovered] handbreadth of a woman’s [body] is considered ‘nakedness,’ ” as explained in sec. 75[:1].

Though a covering suffices [to suspend this prohibition] even with regard to actual nakedness, in this situation a covering7 is not sufficient,8 because regardless, erotic thoughts will be aroused by the touch of the other person’s body from his loins or below. It is for this same reason that the Sages forbade listening to the voice of a woman singing and deemed it “nakedness,” for though the voice is not seen but heard, it arouses erotic thoughts, as explained in sec. 75[:6].

(When does the above apply? When one recites the Shema or Shemoneh Esreh or when one articulates words of Torah. Thinking about words of Torah, however, is permitted9 even when one’s nakedness is actually exposed, for the reason explained in sec. 75[:10]. Needless to say, [thinking about words of Torah is permitted] when one hears the voice of a woman [singing], or lies together with his wife with their bodies touching even if his face is not turned away, even though he is forbidden to articulate [the Shema in such a situation], as will be explained. It is for the same reason that it is permitted to think of holy matters at the time of marital relations.10 For thought is not deemed speech in this context, even though it is deemed speech with regard to [the prohibition against] thinking [about words of Torah] in alleys where filth is present.)11

2 If a man and his wife were sleeping in the same bed there is no need to interpose a garment between them [for the recitation of the Shema], for his wife’s [body] is considered like his own.12 Because of their familiarity, he will not be aroused to erotic thoughts. Nevertheless, he may recite the Shema only if their faces are turned away, i.e., only if they turn back to back, so that her body not touch his nakedness nor will his body touch her nakedness, lest this arouse erotic thoughts.

There is an authority who forbids reciting the Shema while together with one’s wife13 unless a garment is interposed between them. It is proper to give weight to his words.

3 If one is sleeping is the same bed as his children while they are still underage, it is permissible to recite [the Shema] when turned away from them, even without an interposing garment.14 For there is no reason for concern that erotic thoughts will be aroused by the touch of their body and his, so long as his body does not touch their nakedness or their body does not touch his nakedness. If the children are older, one must interpose a garment.

Until when are they considered underage? A boy until he is twelve and a girl until she is eleven. Even if they have manifested signs of physical maturity15 before this time, this is insignificant. In a boy’s thirteenth year and a girl’s twelfth year, if they have manifested signs of physical maturity, [reciting the Shema while in the same bed] is forbidden unless a garment is interposed. If they have not, it is permitted. From the time a boy reaches thirteen and a girl twelve,16 even if they have not manifested signs of maturity, this is forbidden unless a garment is interposed.