I have friends who got engaged to the first person they ever dated, and are now married with kids. Yet here I am, many years and many, many dates later, and I still haven’t met the right person. Have I done something wrong, maybe in a past life, to deserve this as punishment?


There are many possible reasons why you haven’t found the right one yet. But the mere fact that you are still waiting doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you.I still haven’t met the right person

The Talmud compares the miracle of finding one’s soulmate to the miracle of G‑d splitting the Red Sea. Most people assume that the sages simply meant to illustrate the magnitude of the miracle. In fact, there’s more to the comparison than meets the eye.

You’re probably familiar with the basics, but there are a few details about that great crossing you may not know. For instance, the Red Sea is not along the direct route from Egypt to Israel. G‑d led the Israelites on a detour simply to give them a glimpse of His power. Walking on the dry seabed with the waters standing as walls on each side was a revelation that dwarfed the miracles they had witnessed in Egypt. The Israelites left the sea a changed nation.

Another little-known fact is that the Israelites didn’t actually cross the sea. Their path was a big U-shape, beginning and ending on the same bank. This meant that not everyone spent the same amount of time “in the water.” Those who were on the inside lane had a short sojourn in the dried-up sea, while those in the outer lanes had a longer trek.

Why were some in the sea longer than others? Some find the direct path; other take the scenic routePerhaps some people needed to bask longer in G‑d’s miracle to truly absorb it. Or perhaps they had the spiritual depth to be able to handle more divine revelation. The longer they spent in the sea, the deeper the experience of divine wonder. Either way, each person witnessed as much of the miracle as he or she needed to.

So it is with the miracle of marriage. Some find the direct path to their soulmates; others take the scenic route. Hold on tight. You, too, will get through the sea. Even if there’s no end in sight, keep the faith. Your intended may be just around the next bend.