Holding

All day schlepping
I forget to feel the weight of my daughter in my arms
How soft she is against my chest
What precious gift attached to my hip most of the day as I
direct the daily traffic our lives have become
At least I still have the knack for breathing in the beauty of it all
When I remember that I too need a time out
When I become demanding and throw tantrums
So I disconnect from the phone cord the house chores the doctors and bills
I hold her for real and remember our dreams
Just to have moment upon moment
Of living
Of holding each other and holding babies
And holding our friends smile and holding
Holding life
Resting in the sweet aroma of its warmth
I would like to know the address to return all of these wants I did not order
They pile up like junk mail
Deceiving me their importance
Today I will reclaim the space
Clean house
Reclaim the rivers and sun drenched peaks of me
The marvelous oceans and quiet places of me
These moments are sacred
Holding my precious baby and relaying my hearts song to her
My heart beating I love you and I love you even more still
Telling her the secret of what she is without saying a word
While somewhere the stock market rises and falls
My Ahava, my love
Imagining dancing with you in my arms is what kept me conscious during your birth
I hold you in my arms dancing
my moment upon moment
you keep my conscious still