Journeys

Personal journeys.

From the moment you left the homey warmth of your mother's womb to enter into our cold, sterile world, you have begun your personal journey.

In every episode of your life, in your every moments of growth, you are stepping forward on your journey. Your every characteristic, your every talent and ability, and your every encounter with life, contributes to your reaching your final destination--to use your G-d-given talents to accomplish your particular mission in our world.

Enthusiastically you set out on the long trek ahead of you. In your naiveté, you imagine the journey to be a straight one, with clearly delineated directions and sign posts. A journey you assume you are well-equipped to master.

But instead of a well-paved road, you encounter a bumpy, winding route. You find yourself changing lanes often, following detours and side roads, stopping at rest areas and even making some u-turns. There are moments, even days or weeks, when you feel lost and confused with no confidence to continue on.

Setbacks. Your journey is full of them. But each stop, each rest, even each wrong turn is ultimately a point of learning in your journey forward.

"These are the journeys of the children of Israel, going out of the land of Egypt... And they journeyed from... and they camped at..." (Numbers 33:1-49)

The forty-two encampments from Egypt to the Promised Land are replayed in every individual's life, in his journey from his soul's descent to this world at his birth until his return to his Source. (Baal Shem Tov)

The stopping and resting stations are also part of the journey towards the "Holy Land." Pauses, interruptions and setbacks are an inadvertent part of your journey on earth. Each stop, even those that appear as setbacks and wrong turns, are points of learning, prodding you further. (The Lubavitcher Rebbe)

Each setback is meant to provide you with a new vantage point and perception, a new awareness or sensitivity on your journey forward.

Yesterday's destination is now surpassed, and a new one must be set and attained. Self-imposed limitations and constrictions in your attitude or outlook must be overcome to reach your goal.

This is all part of your personal journey, forward and onward…

Relationship Journeys.

She is the one for you. You just knew it from the moment you set your eyes on her.

Beauty, intelligence, sensitivity.

You gazed deeply into her eyes and saw to the depths of her soul, a reflection mirroring your own. You set out on the ultimate journey of bliss and harmony in your idyllic life together.

And then you woke up one morning and realized that your blissful journey of togetherness contained more than you bargained for.

Petty arguments, full blown disagreements, quarrels that lasted for hours or days.

All of a sudden, you realized that this perfect soul that you call your mate has some very real needs and wants--some of which differ drastically from your own. She has her own established outlook and perception on things which can sometimes pull in a very different direction than your own.

Your "smooth" journey has a number of bumps.

And on top of these complexities, life threw you even greater challenges. You experienced a crisis--to your health, to you emotional state, or to your financial wellbeing--external circumstance that just shouldn't have been.

A block in your way. A restriction.

"These are the journeys of the children of Israel going out of the land of Mitzrayim (Egypt)." (Numbers 33:1)

"Mitzrayim," the Hebrew word for Egypt, means borders, restrictions, narrows. On the spiritual level, the journey from Egypt is a journey from the boundaries that limit us--an exodus from the narrow straits of habit, convention and ego to the "good, broad land" of the infinite potential of our G-dly soul. (Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi)

Now begins your real journey. Now begins the hard work.

Look beneath her abrasiveness to discover her sweet essence. See beyond her criticism to find her points of validation. See beyond her endless needs to uncover the beauty of her soul. Work on yourself to transcend your constricted, ego-based vantage point.

Each crisis in your relationship is an opportunity for you to reach a higher level of closeness. Each set-back is a chance to forge a deeper connection and to reveal the deeper bonds of your relationship that only surface in response to difficulty and hardship. Each restriction is an opening to reveal how your relationship is not dependent on surface beauty or good times alone.

Even in the ugly moments of your life together--even in the stops, resting areas and wrong turns of your life--you are there for one another.

For all times.

Our national, cosmic journey.

You are part of a people who was enjoined "to be a light unto the nations"--to bring the values and morality of G-dliness to all of mankind. You are G-d's partner in creation.

So you start out on your journey, well prepared to make a difference, to bring light to this world. You feel embraced by the warmth and comfort of your Partner, ready to take His message to mankind. You are ready to tackle any challenge.

Then comes history. Persecutions, decimations, destructions. The Partner who had started out faithfully at your side, holding your hand, leading the way, seems to have abandoned you.

You feel utterly alone, surrounded by an all-pervasive, frigid darkness.

The journey seems endless. Hardship, loneliness, and pain surround you. Your estrangement with your Partner, the decline in your relationship, the shrouding of mutual love is unbearable.

You feel defeated, ready to despair. Your destination seems to be nowhere in sight.

All forty two journeys--not just the first--were a "going forth out of the land of Egypt." Each stage was a new exodus; even a single journey is a liberation from some personal Egypt. (The Lubavitcher Rebbe)

You don't see how your contribution is bringing mankind forward, because the end point seems too far ahead; but ultimately each step is valuable as its own "exodus," taking you that much further in the right direction.

Moreover, times of separation and setbacks are also part of your journey, and part of your growth. Ultimately, in the Messianic era, these setbacks too will be revealed as points of progress and illumination. You will understand then how each of these bumps were somehow necessary for the development and deepening of your relationship with your Partner.

It is the time of Jacob's trouble; from it he will be save" (Jeremiah 30:7).

"From it he will be saved" -- Salvation is not something that simply follows trouble, it is implicit in it (The Baal Shem Tov)

The moments of constriction, like the rest stops on our way, are ultimately meant to propel us further on your ultimate journey—towards an all encompassing unity with your Creator. Towards the highest and greatest forms of revelation.

Perhaps this, too, is hinted to in the episode at the very conclusion of our Parshah, in the last words of the Book of Numbers.

The five daughters of Tzlafchad, whose father had died without sons, had successfully petitioned for an inheritance in the Land of Israel. Now, the leaders of their tribe approached Moses with a petition of their own. If any of these women will marry someone from another tribe, they argued, this would mean that their sons, who will inherit the land, will likewise be from another tribe.

Moses then decrees in the name of G-d: "Any daughter who possesses an inheritance, shall marry a man of the family of the tribe of her father... so that the inheritance shall not be removed from one tribe to another tribe."

There was a sequel however to this ruling. This restriction on marriage only applied to the first generation of Jews who settled the land. The day on which this inter-tribal marriage ban was removed, years later, was the 15th day of Av. This day was then proclaimed as a national holiday, as great as Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year. The merging and unity of the tribes was something to be celebrated.

Perhaps there is a message here for our national, cosmic journey.

Each member of the nation of Israel contains a special soul, with a G-dly spark. Our separation from one another, and our periods of separation from G-d are ultimately meant to lead us to a higher time period, a greater realization of just how connected we all are--one to the other and each of us to G-d. Like the limbs of one body, we are intrinsically one.

The fifteenth day of Av became a day of such great celebration because it represented the subsequent unity of our people with each other and ultimately will represent our absolute unity with our Creator.

Therefore, the Talmud relates that on this special day, the daughters of Jerusalem would go out and dance in the vineyards and each of them, the "beautiful ones", the ones "with prestigious lineage" and even the "ugly ones" would call out to their prospective bridegrooms to come and take them. (Talmud, Taanit 26b and 31a)

Metaphorically, the maidens going out, represents each of us going out to our Groom and calling to Him. Whether we are beautiful or ugly, worthy or undeserving, we announce, the bond between us in an everlasting one.

Our national journey has been a long and winding one. There were beautiful times, but even more numerous ugly times. Ultimately, each bump in our journey had a purpose and will be revealed as the ultimate expression of closeness between our nation and G-d.

Even in the ugly times, even in the setbacks, our connection to one another goes beyond external beauty or happy times. The bond between our nation and G-d is an everlasting one.