Seven Signs of Love

My little baby is no longer a baby. Sara Leah’s second year birthday is right around the corner. I open up the email that I’ve been receiving from the “baby center” ever since my pregnancy and birth and this time the big story is on: “How the love blossoms between you and your child. “

The article starts by explaining how the bond between parent and child is one of the strongest connections in nature. “Romances come and go, but once you've bonded with your baby you're probably hooked for life, and not because you enjoy the prospect of changing thousands of diapers. Clearly, children have the ability to reach deep into our brains as well as our hearts.”

The article continues to explain, “The love you feel for your child isn't just intellectual or cultural — it's a basic part of your makeup… which explains why babies are so addictive and why we deeply love our older children, tantrums, arguments, and all. The bond will change over the years, but its importance never fades.”

Reading about this unique bond between parent and child, made me think about love, in general, and the various expression of love in our lives. The article made it clear that not all children openly express their love for their parents, and at various stages the love is more dormant and expressed differently, even while it is still there.

I thought of the only other all encompassing love that so resembles this parental love—the love between G-d and His people. Nor do all of us express our love for our Parent in heaven in the same manner or in the same form throughout the various stages of our lives.

When the article continued with “the seven signs that show your child loves you,” I wondered if these basic signs were applicable in our love affair relationship with G-d--if despite our moments of inexpression, this love, too, is a solid one that remains for all times, throughout all our junctures in life.

Here are the seven signs that show your child loves you, followed by my own renditions of its counterpart--the seven signs that show you just how much you love G-d:

1.Your newborn stares into your eyes — he's actually working hard to memorize your face. He doesn't understand anything else about the world, but he knows you're important.

I’m looking for You. I don’t understand anything about the working of this world. So many things don’t make any sense to me. Why do events happen as they do? Why are these the circumstances of my life? I’m confused. I know that I don’t understand, but I also know that You are important to me.

2.Your baby thinks about you even when you're not around. Between 8 and 12 months old, he'll start to scrunch his face and look around when you leave the room — and he'll smile when you return.

I think about You. I think about You when I see the obvious workings of Your hand. And I think about You when I don’t see You and can’t understand where You are hiding or why You have left me. I look for You when You seem to have abandoned me, and I smile in happiness when I palpably feel Your presence in my life.

3.Your toddler throws wicked tantrums. Nope, those screaming fits don't mean he's stopped loving you. He wouldn't be so hurt and angry if he didn't trust you so deeply.

I get angry at You. I am hurt by Your actions and apparent inactions. Silently, I scream that I don’t love You, that I can’t believe in a G-d who acts this way to His children. I rant and rave about the injustices of our world. I do so, because beneath it all, I trust You and love You intensely. I wouldn’t be so hurt and angry if I didn’t trust you so deeply.

4. Your toddler runs to you for comfort when he falls down or feels sad. Kids this age may not truly understand the meaning of "I love you," but their actions speak louder than words.

I run to You for when I need comfort. I look for You when I feel sad. I seek You when I fall down or don’t succeed. I may not truly be able to articulate what it means to “love” You or even what my connection to You is, but my actions speak louder than words.

5. Your preschooler gives you a flower picked from the garden, a finger-painted heart, a sparkly rock, or another gift.

I resolve to do something just for You. I give you a gift to express my love—some small action, a little positive deed, something that I have handpicked to take upon myself, just for You.

6. Your preschooler wants your approval. He'll start to be more cooperative around the house, and he'll look for chances to impress. "Look at me!" will become a catchphrase.

I seek Your approval. I want to do what’s right in Your eyes. I look for opportunities to “impress” You. I try to catch Your attention and get Your consent on how to lead a more meaningful life.

7. Your grade-schooler trusts you with secrets, like his first crush or his most embarrassing moment. You're his confidante, even if he shies away from your hugs in public.

I trust You with my deepest secrets. Even if in public I shy away from open demonstrations of my connection to You, You are my true confidante. I come to You to tell You about my greatest moments as well as my most embarrassing ones. I trust You implicitly with everything that goes on in my life.