The All or Nothing Syndrome
By Yehudis Karbal
When difficulties arise, it is only human nature to focus on what's not working, what's not perfect, rather than what could possibly be workable. Because the pain and darkness are so pervasive – it feels as if "it's all wrong" or "there's nothing good ...
Blogs » Save this Marriage » The All or Nothing Syndrome
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Diffusing Tense Situations--With Questions
By Yehudis Karbal
In any relationship – husband/wife, teacher/student, parent/child – one of the best ways to diffuse a tense or difficult situation is simply to think in terms of asking a question rather than preaching, nagging, begging, ordering, threatening, shaming, ...
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Diffusing Tense Situations--With Questions
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The Magic of the Four Questions
By Yehudis Karbal
A wise parent or teacher who will learn to focus on questions as the key to helping a child develop his "brain power." Here are examples of non-productive questions versus thought-provoking ones...
Blogs » Help! I've got kids... » The Magic of the Four Questions
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Two Stages in Marriage
Shavuot and Purim: Excitement versus Commitment
By Yehudis Karbal
In the pre-marital phase we are focused on "what am I getting." In the post-marital state our focus shifts from to "what am I giving."
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Two Stages in Marriage
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Emotional Intelligence vs. Academic Intelligence
By Yehudis Karbal
The most stable unions are among couples who have found ways to air differences without escalating into personal attacks or retreating into stony silence. They have mastered these eight elements...
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Emotional Intelligence vs. Academic Intelligence
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Why Can't He/She Be More Like Me?
Dealing with Gender Differences
By Yehudis Karbal
Although there are cultural reasons for our differences in emotions and behavior, recent breakthrough research reveals that the root of many puzzling gender differences may lie in our brains. How are couples to deal with these natural differences?
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Why Can't He/She Be More Like Me?
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For Husbands Only: The Secret to a Great Marital Relationship
By Yehudis Karbal
Time and time again, I have heard from women regarding what they need most in the relationship: "If only he would be more patient, if only he would speak carefully with me, if only he wouldn't get so angry all the time."
Blogs » Save this Marriage » For Husbands Only: The Secret to a Great Marital Relationship
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Powerful Words
And The Power of Words
By Yehudis Karbal
Yael and Yosef had a "good enough" marriage, but their marriage felt boring, and on automatic. Whenever they did find time to be together, the talk usually drifted to problems and negativity. As a result of their disconnection, they were both feeling ...
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Powerful Words
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Growing Through Our Children
Overcoming Unhealthy Generational Patterns
By Yehudis Karbal
Sara was very much like her mother, dynamic, outspoken, and definitely more comfortable in the "driver's seat." She saw how frustrated her mother was with her father's quiet, more passive way. And she was now reliving that anger in her own marriage.
Blogs » Save this Marriage » Growing Through Our Children
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The Chronically Critical Spouse--Strategies to Maintain Peace
By Yehudis Karbal
Instead of getting into a power struggle with a person who constantly blames, shames and labels, try a refreshing approach that I call "the Pareve Response."
Blogs » Save this Marriage » The Chronically Critical Spouse--Strategies to Maintain Peace
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