"Please say that you are my sister, so that they will favor me because of you, and my life will be spared thanks to you."
-- Breishis 12:13
Classic Questions
How could Avraham say that Sarah was his sister, placing her at risk of being captured, in order to save his own life? (v. 13)
Ramban: Avraham unintentionally committed a great sin by bringing his righteous wife into a compromising situation in an attempt to save his own life. He should have trusted in G‑d that He would save them. In fact, Avraham's departure from the land of Cana'an to Egypt as a result of the famine was also a sin, since he should have trusted in G‑d to save him from hunger. As a result of Avraham's mistake, the Egyptian exile was decreed on his descendants.
Abarbanel: Avraham was willing to sacrifice his life to save Sarah from being abducted. However, he realized that if he had been identified as Sarah's husband they would have killed him and abducted her in any case. Therefore, allowing himself to be killed for her sake would have been totally futile.
Avraham's actions here could be compared to Aharon's sanctioning of the golden calf, for Aharon knew that if he had objected to the calf the Jewish people would have killed him in any case—so what was to be gained?
Be'er Mayim Chayim: Avraham did not tell the Egyptians that Sarah was not married. Rather, he said that her husband had not accompanied them. Consequently, Avraham was not suggesting in any way to the Egyptians that Sarah was available for marriage. He simply saw no benefit in revealing to them that he was her husband.
Gur Aryeh: Avraham did not expect that Sarah would be abducted at all. He thought that the aristocrats of Egypt would offer him gifts in an attempt to win his favor, so he would give Sarah to them. He was sure that they would not be thugs that would take her by force. He did not expect the king himself to abduct her.
Tiferes Yehonason: The Patriarchs only had the halachic status of Jews while they remained in the Land of Israel. Thus, when Avraham and Sarah left the Land of Israel, entering Egypt, they left the jurisdiction of Jewish Law and were bound only by Noachide law. According to Noachide Law, a man can divorce his wife simply by breaking association with her. Therefore, Avraham broke association with his wife by saying, "Please say that you are my sister," which was effectively a divorce. In this way, if Sarah was taken, her association with another man would not be sinful.
Zohar: Rabbi Elazar said, "The verse, 'Please say that you are my sister,' is problematic. Would Avraham, who feared G‑d and was loved by G‑d, say that about his wife for his own benefit?"
He answered: "Even though Avraham feared G‑d, he did not rely on his own merit. He did not ask G‑d [to save her] in his own merit, but rather in hers. [He knew that it was] through her merit that he would accumulate wealth from the other nations, since a person acquires money in the merit of his wife... Avraham went to Egypt to obtain food from the other nations in her merit. He relied on her merit that he would not be hurt and she would not be touched, and because of this he was not afraid to say, 'She is my sister'" (III 52b).
The Rebbe's Teachings
Why did Avraham Worry about Gifts? (v. 13)
Rashi writes that when Avraham said, "Please say that you are my sister, so that they will favor me because of you," he was hoping "that they would favor him by giving him gifts" (v. 13).
This statement seems, at first glance, to be quite bizarre. We are reading here of an extremely tense moment for Avraham and Sarah when they are forced to postpone fulfilling G‑d's request to remain in the Land of Israel and make a detour into a corrupt and murderous Egypt. So severe is the situation that Avraham deems it appropriate to put his wife at risk of being abducted, by claiming that she is his sister (as the commentators discuss at length—see 'Classic Questions'). And yet, in the midst of this life-threatening quandary, Rashi informs us that Avraham was worrying about receiving gifts! How could he be concerned with such comparative trivialities as receiving gifts from the Egyptians, when his life and that of his wife were in grave danger?
In fact, the Zohar seems to place a similar stress as Rashi, explaining that "through her merit he would accumulate wealth from the other nations, since a person acquires money in the merit of his wife." But surely, financial gain was not the main issue of concern here?
The Explanation
According to Ramban, when Avraham left the land of Cana'an—where G‑d had explicitly told him to go—due to famine, he committed "a sin, since he should have trusted in G‑d to save him from hunger."
Rashi, however, makes it clear that in his opinion Avraham's journey to Egypt was with Divine consent. Rashi writes that the "famine in the land" (v. 10) was "in that land alone, to test him, whether he would question the words of G‑d, Who commanded him to go to the land of Cana'an, and now He was forcing him to leave it."
Thus, according to Rashi, Avraham's trust in G‑d remained perfect, and it would have been incorrect for him to remain in Cana'an at a time of famine and simply rely on G‑d to provide food.
At first glance, a person's efforts to save himself in a time of personal disaster could be perceived as a lack of trust in G‑d. For if the person genuinely believed that G‑d would save him, then why would he do anything at all to be saved?
In truth, however, the Torah requires a person to pursue acts of self-preservation. These acts do not in any way detract from the person's trust in G‑d, since he believes with complete faith that his salvation will come from G‑d. It is only that for whatever reason, G‑d in His wisdom has commanded man to make a natural channel through which the Divine blessing of salvation will come. A failure to create this physical channel, if it is available to the person, would be a transgression of the injunction "not to rely on a miracle" (Shabbos 32a). The result would be that either: a.) The person's salvation may not come, and he will be answerable for taking his life in vain, or b.) If G‑d does save him through a miracle, his merits are diminished (ibid.), and he is considered to be a "nuisance to G‑d" (see Sha'ar haGemul).
(If, however, there are no means of natural self-preservation available to the person, he should not despair, for this is a clear sign that G‑d has exempted him from making a physical channel.)
Thus, in our case, Avraham was correct to leave Cana'an and pursue a physical channel by which he might obtain food to save his family's life.
Furthermore, G‑d had promised Avraham, "I will bless you" (12:2), which Rashi explains, "with money." Thus, we can assume that Avraham was constantly looking out for a possible physical channel through which G‑d's blessing of wealth might occur.
Consequently, when he was forced to go to Egypt, he perceived it not as the retraction of G‑d's promise to make him wealthy, but rather as the possible fulfillment of G‑d's blessing. For perhaps Avraham's attempt to protect his life by presenting Sarah as his sister would actually bring him wealth.
In fact, this is precisely what occurred. The Torah states that "he [bestowed gifts] on Avram [because of] her. So he had flocks, cattle, donkeys, menservants, maidservants, she-donkeys and camels" (v. 16).
And, as the Zohar states, Avraham did not place Sarah at any unnecessary risk at all, since he was aware of her great merits which would surely stand her in good stead. To the contrary, it was her merit which ensured Avraham's survival, and her merit proved to be the means by which Avraham received G‑d's blessing of wealth, since "a person acquires money in the merit of his wife."
(Based on Likutei Sichos vol. 20, pp. 38-39; vol. 15, pp. 486-7)