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Did You Ask To Be Born?


Once upon a time there was a village full of disgruntled people. All day long they walked around with these sour faces, each bemoaning his troubles, each jealous of her neighbor's successes.

One day, a wise old man arrived in the village. He assembled them all in the village square and said to them: "I want you each to go and bring your most precious possession, the thing you cherish most in your life, and place it here in middle of the square." Soon there was a large pile of bundles and packages, of all shapes and sizes, in the center of the village square.

"Now," instructed the wise man, "you may each select for yourselves any one of these gifts. The choice is yours--take any package you desire."

Every man, woman and child in the village did exactly the same thing. Each chose his own bundle.


The Torah, as we all know, begins at the beginning, describing G-d's creation of the heavens and the earth, the continents and the oceans, vegetation and animal life. Then, in its 26th verse, we proceed to the creation of man. "And G-d said," we read, "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness..."

G-d is asking a council of human souls if He should create the human soul! Let us? Up to this point--and from here on through the rest of the Torah--G-d is spoken of as the ultimate singularity. He is the Boss, the exclusive source and mover of all. But in this single instance, there is an "us," a choir of opinions, a supernal boardroom before which the Creator places a proposal and asks for approval.

With whom did G-d consult when He desired to create the human being? Our sages offer a number of explanations. One is that G-d asked the angels, so as to temper their later criticisms of the failings of mortal man. Another explanation is that G-d was involving all elements of the universe, or all aspects of His infinitely potentialed being, in the formation of the multi-faceted soul of man. All these explanations, of course, raise at least as many questions as they answer. Indeed, it is regarding this particular verse that the sages have stated: "The Torah says it thus; anyone who wishes to misunderstand, let him misunderstand..." Obviously, there is an important message here to us--important enough that the Torah insists on this particular phraseology despite the fact that it allows for (encourages?) misunderstanding.

But there is one interpretation of this verse which presents us with a conundrum of a paradox. The Midrash offers the following explanation: "With whom did He consult? With the souls of the righteous."1 G-d is asking a council of human souls if He should create the human soul!

The plot thickens. Who are these "righteous" (tzaddikim) with whom G-d consulted? According to the prophet Isaiah, "Your people are all tzaddikim."2 We each posses the soul of a tzaddik (regardless of the extent to which we allow its expression). In other words, G-d asked each and every one of us if we desire to be created, if we choose to accept the challenge of earthly life. Only then did He proceed to create us.


If asking a soul whether it wants to be created sounds like a catch-22, this paradox in fact resolves a much deeper paradox--the paradox of divine decree and human choice.

G-d is forever telling us what to do G-d is forever telling us what to do. Indeed, the very word Torah means "instruction," and that's basically what the Torah is: a series of instructions from on high. And yet we are told that "a fundamental principle of the Torah" is that "freedom of choice has been granted to man."3 What exactly are our choices, if G-d is constantly instructing us?

The question runs deeper. Let us assume that, in any given situation, under any set of circumstances, the choice is ours as to how we should act. But what kind of choice is this, if no one asked us if we want to be in that situation and under those set of circumstances in the first place? What kind of "choice" is there, if we didn't choose whether or not we should be presented with that choice?

So the Torah reveals to us this amazing secret: that ultimate choice was made by us, before we even existed. Before G-d emanated your soul and breathed it into your body, you were asked if you should be. So in every situation in which you find yourself, in every challenge you face in your life--you are there because you chose to be placed in that life.


The life we have is the life we want We go through life complaining, "I didn't ask to be born...!" But a thousand times a day we refute that claim. With countless choices and actions, we affirm that the life we have is the life we want.

Of course we do. After all, we chose it.

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FOOTNOTES
1. Midrash Rabbah, Bereishit 8:7.
2. Isaiah 60:21.
3. Maimonides' Mishneh Torah, Laws of Teshuvah 5:1.

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Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: May 12, 2011
asked to be born?
I with all the troubles and miseries, i thank G-D. for now I see why I suffered shock-treatment , institutionalized, etc I asked to be born but, I did not realise which path I had to follow!! now I pray, work, Free-time Play the Guitar & sing in Restuarants or any place where i can share the joy of Life!!
Posted By Milton Belindo Marcal Jose Xavier Colaco, Lisbon, Portugal

Posted: Jan 13, 2011
Did I Ask To Be Born?
I know that people say, "life is what you make it", but what if some people don't want a life? What if they wouldn't care to be born or to have experienced what life would be like, before they were born? That is me. I would never had decided to be born and brought into this world if I had a choice, but obviously noone has that decision. I'm a person that hates other people, including myself. I don't care about anyone, including myself. I have alot of hate inside of me, than nice. So, that's why I say, "I didn't ask to be born". I have tried to commit suicide, but it didn't work. I hate life , the world and everything in it. That will not change, no matter what.
Posted By Anonymous

Posted: Mar 4, 2010
CHOICE FROM A CONVERT TO BE
Our path's in life are drawn by G-D before we can walk.Before we can even breathe. It is our choice as to whether we skip, walk cautiously, run carelessly, stop to smell the roses and thank G-D for all he has given. I choose to walk slowly and thankfully...

Choose to walk even more more slowly with your children. Their legs are shorter, their laughs are louder and their hearts held more widely than our own. We thank G-D when we can see through their eyes..
Posted By Anonymous, BROOKLYN, NY

Posted: Aug 3, 2009
Choices--and choices
The soul wanted to be born, but wanted to be safe.
Instead, it lived in constant fear, in the certainty that if its own parents wanted it dead, all the more so everyone else also wanted it dead, it was an intruder in the universe, it was always checking out signals looking for a sign of disapproval that might mean an attack, a strap, a rape, a murder attempt....
And ashamed of having intruded into a world that hated it.
And not even aware of these background assumptions. Merely aware of feeling inept, incompetent, uncomfortable. Not aware of the fear or the anger which it spent all its energy stuffing down. Finally around age 45 it lacked energy to stuff it down and began eating and got fat. At no time did it actualize its talents or make the contribution it was genetically programmed to make. It was useless to itself and to the world, it knew little or no joy, just occasional moments of being itself. Its whole life was a waste. Why was this soul have been sent to such parents?
Posted By Reuven Goldfarb

Posted: Aug 3, 2009
Choices--and choices
When Gd was about to give the Torah, the notice went out to all the souls, and those who wanted to participate in the Giving of the Torah came and stood at Mt. Sinai. And whenever a Jewish mother is about to give birth, she gets a soul that CHOSE to stand and receive the Torah.

When husband and wife make love, all the sperms swim as fast as they can, and the one that wins the race gets to be born. We are all the result of our little sperm swimming fast enough to win. So we chose at that level.

But some people--people who shake infants, people who put a baby in a frying pan, people who rape a baby, even people who take a strap every night to a child too young to talk-- should not be allowed to have chldren. G-d is one of the three involved in creating a child, and could refuse children to such people.

Instead, parents produce a gifted child, bright, beautiful, talented, and rage at the baby, whip the baby, set the baby up to be raped by multiple attackers over the years. TBC
Posted By Reuven Goldfarb

Posted: July 31, 2009
Life
Shalom .. Life is a Mystery! What occurs BEFORE we are born is G-d's business, not ours. We can only guess. AFTER we are born we are given the choice as to how we live our lives. Either for good or for evil. And then, we return to our Creators' domain!

In between, we are given 'tests' as Job was given. But we do not choose our tests, either before or after birth, rather, we are given a choice as to how we RESPOND to G-d's testings.

In short -- we do not choose our life before birth. We are given the gift of life, and thereafter it is our responsibility to make proper choices to live our lives in love and fear of G-d.

Why would anyone choose to dwell in a physical body that has been 'cursed' with disease and suffering, even if assured that in the end all would be just dandy? For what purpose?

Our Creator desires that we be blessed and in 'that place' of beauty and glory one can not possibly, imagine, far less, choose human suffering.
Posted By Annette

Posted: July 30, 2009
Our will to be born
In Pirkei Avos it says that we are born and die against our will. How does this go together?
Posted By Moishe

Posted: Oct 28, 2008
The eternal faith of the soul
The lesson here as I see it is that our souls were with G-d before coming to this world. It is not clear that the soul knew what hardships would be endured, but nonetheless in complete faith and trust in G-d the soul come here understanding that whatever it would go through would serve a purpose higher than we can comprehend on this level. To me this article is about the eteranl love and perfect faith of the soul for the Creator.
Posted By Lana
via chabadofalabama.com

Posted: Oct 27, 2008
No one can ask to be born before one is born!
It is clear truth understood by all mature adults, that no one can ask to be born before one is born and that our birth is a free gift resulted from the love and passion and shared hope between our 2 natural parents, which by culture are granted as the first adults to guide our free will and help our free choices - in hope it serves us well as it has served our blessed forefathers who were chosen by Alohim on this only living planet within our gifted universe.
What you do and how, is why, is by employing your gifted and selected wisdom, and where The Torah is the best original eminent truth in writing to help guide us in gaining the blessed benefits of creation and the known blessed evolution...
Some unfortunately, are born without all the Natural blessings of full health and capabilities, due to genetic and lifestyle wrongs the parents must have been aware of or tested for avoiding, by employing our honest sub-conscience and modern scientific methods.
Posted By Amnon M Cohen, Victoria, BC Canada

Posted: Oct 27, 2008
The Life We Have is the Life We Want
I have a friend who is suffering from ALS. He is completely paralyzed, and can't talk and is dying a slow, horrible death

Is this the life he wants? No one would want this! Can anyone explain how one can say that this is the life he wants?.
Posted By Bob, Boston, MA



 


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