I recently told my sponsor that I had contacted a Recovery Rabbi and that I
was beginning to do the 11th step as suggested on the Jewish Recovery website.
His response was less than enthusiastic: "If you want what I have, you'll do
like I do, which is: 1) Read the 3rd and 7th Step prayers. 2) Read Emmet Fox. 3)
Read One Day At A Time. 4) Meditate for five minutes." I have nothing against
doing all that, but I really wanted to reconnect with my Jewish roots, something
that my non-Jewish sponsor couldn't help me with.
So I began to seek out other Jewish AAs. I recently went to my home group,
the Bellflower Big Book Group, and began to ask around, stealthily. I found out
that one Jew became a “born again Jew” through Christian missionaries selling
“Messianic Judaism,” another goes to Saddleback, and the third goes to services,
but not much in the way of praying. I really wasn’t sure of what my goal here
was, but I figured if I begin the discussion, G-d would show me the end.
Then the speaker began to speak. Her first drink was Manischewitz plum wine
during a Jewish Holiday in Stonybrook, Long Island, NY. My first drink was
Manischewitz in the back of a Reform Synagogue during Passover in Stonybrook,
Long Island... She shared the horrors of growing up being abused by her father,
getting abandoned in a mental institution (notably the one from One Flew Over
The Cuckoo's Nest), becoming a prostitute, getting severely raped, not caring
about being raped because she wanted to die. Drinking and drugging all the way
through -- even through pregnancy -- to assuage the mental anguish. She got
sober, got a job, got a house, raised her child, raised a foster child, raised
her sister’s child, raised a friend’s child, got a bigger house and began to
help raise abused and abandoned teens. She now runs a non-profit organization,
The Teen Project, to raise those
children, and has raised 23 children whose stories all end in college admissions
and successful marriages.
To make a long story longer, I shared with her about my first drink in
Stonybrook and getting drunk on Passover at eight years old, and we both laughed
at the coincidence. I asked her which branch of Judaism she belonged too and
found out she goes to Chabad. I really wanted to join her so I wanted to know if
she goes to a service with both men and women, and she said, “Yes, but it is
probably too far for you. It's in Orange County, CA.” I live in Orange County,
CA... A few questions later I find out that the synagogue she goes to is a
couple of miles down the road from my house...
This Shabbat at 9 a.m. you will find me at
Chabad of Mission Viejo together with
my newfound friend in AA. I do love the small miracles. G-d helped me with both
the question and the answer one more time. I am excited to see what else G-d has
in store for me.
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