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A Soldier’s Funeral


The mourners walked quietly towards Mount Herzl, the military cemetery in Jerusalem. They are coming from all corners and all parts of Israel to say farewell to Dvir Emanueloff, the first IDF fatality of the Gaza War. The vast majority of them never met him. But they walk sadly and quietly to his grave, nonetheless.

The crowd is massive. The people who knew him personally stand in the center, near his freshly dug grave. The rest of the mourners look on from wherever they can find space. Some have to climb high up the hill before they can see anything.

A rabbi is giving a speech. The kind of sweeping, all-encompassing speech that one would expect to hear at a military funeral. I can't help but feel slightly confused as I observe that most people are standing stoically, hardly betraying any emotions. Didn't they come here to mourn?

Dvir's sister, Hadas, begins speaking, and everything changes.

"We only spoke yesterday," she says, "you wanted to say 'shalom' and that you are going to war. I said, 'do not say shalom to me,'" and she bursts into tears.

The feel of the crowd begins to change. Sniffles can be heard, but not seen.

As Hadas soldiers through her speech, she continues to cry after almost every sentence. When she reaches the end, the crowd is no longer hiding their tears. They are openly crying along with her. Soldiers are hugging each other. Men are passing tissues to the women.

"I want my son to know you, the uncle who can fix his cars. I don't want to say goodbye, I want you here with your big smile. Give Dad a kiss. I love you and I thank you for all the years that you were my dearest brother."

They are trying so hard to hold back, trying so hard to be strong in this time of difficulty, but this outpour of emotion is too much. The crowd ripples into a sea of sniffles.

Speaker after speak gets up. More rabbis. Two of his friends. One friend, Avichai, imagines a life without Dvir: "Only yesterday you were alive and breathing. Only yesterday you called me... How will our graduation be like without you, what will be with all our plans, how will our Fridays be like now? How will it be without your special smile? You left us orphaned."

Avichai is in the army and perhaps because of this it seems particularly hard for him to handle his emotions. He talks in a monotone. But every now and then his voice breaks, and everyone can suddenly see the heartache he is going through. With each crack of his voice, the crowd breaks more. Their strength saps.

The funeral continues, as so many have in this place before it, in Israeli military tradition. A man sings a prayer. And soldiers shoot into the air. As they shoot, the family can be heard wailing, as if the fired bullets have released something within them.

People begin to leave. Others file towards the grave to pay their last respects. Many carry stones with them to put on the grave, an Israeli tradition.

As I stand here, the second funeral I have attended in two months, more than in my entire life, I cannot help but find this whole scene remarkable. In what other country do people who don't know a simple soldier flock to his funeral? In what other country is everyone truly affected by the passing of every single person they do not know?

The fact that has become apparent to me in my stay in Israel is that every life, every person who lives in its boundaries, is regarded as a special, unique diamond. And once the spark of that diamond leaves, the entire nation feels it. With each casualty, Israel mourns.

The crowd starts to thin. The press leaves. And a few mourners remain. One girl is staring at the grave and crying. Sobbing like I have never seen anyone sob before except on television. For an hour she cries. For an hour her sobs cut into our hearts like knives. I don't know who she is. Maybe Hadas? Whoever she is, she seems to be the nucleus of everyone's emotions. The one person willing to truly express the despair this nation feels. The despair of losing a dear, cherished brother. The despair of the necessity of war. And the despair that G‑d still hasn't delivered us from our plight.

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By Elad Nehorai   More articles...  |   RSS Listing of Newest Articles by this Author
Elad Nehorai is originally from Chicago and now studies at a yeshiva in Jerusalem.

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Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: Jan 15, 2009
To Alex in Vienna
While I agree with the sentiment that war is to be avoided and that all lose of life is upsetting, the Torah clearly give it a place in life.
It's not pleasant, but it's not the same as the Commandment "Thou shalt not MURDER".
Murder is arbitrary killing. War is not.

May we merit to see peace speedily in our days.
Posted By Anonymous

Posted: Jan 14, 2009
Let's pray for Moshiach!

AM YISROEL CHAI
Posted By Anonymous

Posted: Jan 8, 2009
there are no heroes in war
I am going to write something that nobody will like but it's important that we bare it in mind.

The ten comandments say: You shall not kill.

That's all that war is about unfortunately. I am proud of our soldiers for the work they are doing because I don't have the guts but to be honest. Violence is not an answer to violence.

I request all jews that read this blog to pray for world peace and not just in Israel. It breaks my heart to see kids being hit by bombs etc. We must want world peace because only in this manner can we grow spiritually.

I would love to see the Arabs, chinese, israelis, jews, etc living side by side and striving each day for a win-win situation.

And let's pray for our children as they are the only real losers in war.
Posted By Alex, Vienna, Austria

Posted: Jan 7, 2009
Condolences
I am a Jewish-American who is also a veteran of our Armed Forces.

This conflict and everytime Israel has to defend herself places me in a very unique setting. These events make me realize that I am after all a Jew first and an American citizen second.

There are no words that I can muster to assuage the pain you must feel at this time.

So I will just conclude by praying for Shalom for your son Dvir and for all the sons, fathers, and loved ones who will lose their lives due to this unrelenting madness called Islam.

May G-d bless Israel and His fighters of the IDF...AM YISRAEL CHAI
Posted By Russell

Posted: Jan 6, 2009
Am Israel Chai~ :D
Posted By Amir, Singapore, Singapore

Posted: Jan 6, 2009
Heroes of Israel
We shall honour the heroes of Israel. History has repeated itself. Its time we defend our nation again from the harmful people. Hashem is g_d. He shall protect the Jews and honour the heroes who fought for Israel. In the name of Torah, lets keep on defending work towards the goal of Peace, so that Middle-east becomes a peaceful nation again.
Posted By Amir, Singapore, Singapore

Posted: Jan 6, 2009
Dvir Emanueloff z"l
Nice piece of writing. Very strong last paragraph. I'm sure that it was a very emotional experience for you. It sure was for me, when I took my sons to the Mt. Herzl funeral in August 2006 of Yonatan Einhorn z"l, killed the previous night in Lebanon. We didn't know him, either, but I felt a need to be there, to identify as best as I could, with the family and with Israel. Anyone in Israel at times like this owes it to themselves and to the Jewish nation to identify with the bad, just as we like to identify with the good.
Posted By Hillel Kuttler, Baltimore, MD



 


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