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How does a busy working woman prepare for Shabbat?


By Chani Benjaminson

Question:

I need help. My family has always enjoyed Shabbat meals and I light the Shabbat candles. Now we have decided to become totally Shabbat observant. Problem is, I am a professional. I work a lot. Quitting is not an option, and I leave work on Fridays barely in time to arrive home by sundown.

How can I possibly prepare Shabbat? Can we ever have anyone over? Frankly, worrying about Shabbat all week is stressing me out, and it seems to be contrary to the entire Shabbat spirit.

I would really appreciate practical tips from women who have actually had to deal with these issues.

Answer:

It's great that you have made the decision to be Shabbat observant; Shabbat is such a blessing, if it didn't exist it would have to be invented! I realize it is hard, but know that you are not alone; there are many Jewish women in your position who are able to juggle both. Here are some suggestions, let me know if they work for you or not!

  • Prepare for Shabbat during the week. If you bake challah, bake it on Sunday. Make the chicken or meat on a weeknight and freeze it. Chicken soup freezes excellently albeit without the veggies. Even potato kugel freezes well. All you have to do then on Friday afternoon is get it all warmed up.
  • Get a crock-pot (there are many on the market available at quite reasonable prices) and put in the chicken/meat and potatoes or rice in the morning, by the time you come home you will have a piping hot Shabbat meal ready and waiting. Fish takes only a few minutes to prepare, if you eat gefilte fish you can buy the jars of ready-made fish to save more time.
  • Set the Shabbat table on Thursday night so that the candles and all you need will be ready when you get home—one less thing to do when you're rushing before Shabbat.
  • About guests: you don't have to have a five-course meal in order to have guests. Try inviting one or two people over, and see how it goes, I'm sure you and your family will enjoy having guests over.
  • Finally, many women and men who are Shabbat observant are able to compromise with their work places in the following manner: during winter months when Shabbat comes in so early, they either come in earlier on Friday, stay later on other days or work a bit on Sunday to make up for the extra couple of hours they take off in order to be home at a decent time before sundown. Perhaps see if you can work something out with your office on those lines.

I know you can do it!

Chani Benjaminson for Chabad.org
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Chani Benjaminson is co-director of Chabad of the South Coast, coordinator of Chabad.org's Ask the Rabbi and Feedback department and is a member of the editorial staff of Chabad.org

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Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: Dec 6, 2010
Keeping Shabbat
Thank you, ladies for your replies and encouragement. The one serious concern I have is doing something so offensive that my guests will feel they cannot stay for the meal. How bad does it have to be for that to happen? Maybe it would be better to wait until I'm more convinced I have it right.

I worry about things like the Shabbat setting in my oven. Is it OK to use this even though I have to open the oven door to take out the food. If everything spends the night in the oven and crockpot, can it be used on Shabbos? Or do I still need a blech?

Thanks again for answering. Hope to hear from you again.
Posted By Anonymous, Ottawa, Canada

Posted: Dec 6, 2010
Making Shabbat special!
Don't get too freaked about "doing something wrong". I have lived on four continents and a dozen countries and if there is one thing I hav learned it is that what is perfectly acceptable in one place is a giant no-no in another. There are a number of books that can help you out. To find something geared to your locale I suggest that you ask your rabbi, or better yet, your rebbetzin for a couple of titles and make it your Shabbat afternoon read. This way...two birds with one stone...the kids have to leave you alone because you are "studying" and you learn some good information. (After nine kids you learn a thing or two about getting your share of peace and quiet.) Good Luck!
Posted By Anonymous, S Johns, FL

Posted: Dec 4, 2010
There is indeed a lot to learn about keeping Shabbat. Even people who have been keeping Shabbat all their lives should be continually refreshing their knowledge because there are so many details involved. But one of the best ways to learn is from other people, so by all means, invite friends. If you do make some mistake, remember that so many of us make mistakes on Shabbat, but this time you're in luck because you've got a friend on the spot who can help you out.

If you have any specific questions beforehand, please feel free to ask, but again, don't worry about not getting everything right the first time. Shabbat is a learning process, and what's most important is to be moving in the right direction.
Posted By Malkie Janowski for Chabad.org, Coral Springs

Posted: Dec 2, 2010
Learning how to do Shabbat properly!
I'm new at keeping Shabbat and I'm not always sure I've got things right. So I worry about inviting friends who are shomer Shabbat. Don't know how to handle it if I make a mistake. There sure seem to be a lot of rules to learn. So far I just do the best I can, learning all the time. But how do I invite friends if not sure I've got it right? What if something happens when they are here for dinner? Any thoughts would be appreciated. Thanks.
Posted By Anonymous, Ottawa, Canada

Posted: Jan 13, 2010
Kids love helping too!
I have three boys; 14. 12 & 7. I taught all three how to make Challah and have an easy recipe box for them of their favorite foods. Each week we take turns being the "manager" of Shabbos dinner.

The "manager" picks the meal and is in charge of making the Challah. Meanwhile, the rest of us clean the house and prepare the table. When we are done with that, we meet the "manager" in the kitchen to tell us what help they will need in finishing up the meal.

During the time of blessing, my husband gives a special thanks to the "manager" of Shabbos that day and we all thank the person and applaud them for allowing G-d to work through them and make Shabbos possible, special and fun.

The kids love this and look forward to their day as "manager". It has really helped me tremendously in not having it all bear on my shoulders and teaches the kids cooking, cleaning, team work and organizational skills as well :)
Posted By Wendy, Owensboro, KY

Posted: Dec 17, 2008
Working women with kids
Challa Sunday or buy it. Thursday defrost chicken. I defrost 2 - 3 chickens and separate the whites for schnitzel and the darks I bake in the oven. slice garlic about 5-6 cloves fresh lemon and a little salt and cumin. Sprinkle on top corn flake crumbs. If you like put chicken spice with paprika. On cap of oil. I put it in the fridge and bake when I get home. If you don't have time. Do it earlier. Schnitzel - 3 bowls. 1 flour, 2. 3 eggs with a little salt., 3. bread crumbs - Pereg with spices is the BEST. I kid can dip them and put on plate. Stack the plates until you are ready to fry. You can do it Thurs or Friday am or when you get home if you have enough time. You can also freeze ready fried schnitzel. for durring the week if it's too much food.
Soup with bones and a few pieces.
Salad with Lemon and garlic dressing. Lemon , garlic, salt oil ,mayo, cumin. the best.
Posted By SH, Chicago, IL

Posted: Nov 10, 2008
preparing for Shabbos
Someone made a comment about being a teacher and preparing for Shabbos. I teach full time and am able to prepare for Shabbos. here is what works for me. I make my challah in steps. Sift flour on one day, make the dough another, and shape and bake on the third day. That way I don't get overwhelmed. Also make things in large batches and cook in small batches so you can make many weeks in advance. Start inviting close friends as guests. That way you can relax on the entertaing and focus on enjoying the beauty of Shabbos.
Posted By Anonymous, Philadelphia, PA

Posted: May 21, 2008
busy women preparing for Shabbat
Don't forget the all important choice of hiring help, or having a girl in your community come to help on Thursday night.
Posted By Anonymous, Jerusalem, Israel

Posted: May 19, 2008
Great Sugesstion
I know of a Rabi in Canada that used his crock pot to the point he had four of them that way he had enough for passover as well. He did this before he married so the cooking was all done by the time he come home from the Office at temple.
Posted By Deborah Nelson, Commerce City, Co.

Posted: May 18, 2008
PREPARING FOR SHABBOS
When I make chicken soup I make a huge pot, puree the veggies into the soup. Freeze in jars. This way I have soup for weeks. Easy roast potatoes: in a plastic ziploc cut up potatoes (wedges) paprika, garlic powder, salt and pepper, olive oil to coat. Bake 45 min. covered at 350, uncover for 15. Always a winner.
Posted By TAMI FROM SCOTTSDALE, scottsdale, AZ



 


Food on Shabbat
How does a busy working woman prepare for Shabbat?
What gift can I bring to my Shabbat meal hosts?
How do we add a special ambiance to our Shabbat meals?
Why the soup, chicken and kugel?
Is it permitted to warm up food?
Why cover the stove?
What is gefilte fish?
Why is it customary to eat fish on Friday night?
What is Cholent?
Why do we eat Cholent on Shabbat?
Why are many not particular to eat bread during the third Shabbat meal?
What is the rule regarding eating on Shabbat foods which have words on them?
Do I Have to Eat Meat on Shabbat?

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