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What Can I Do about My Bad Luck?

What Can I Do about My Bad Luck?

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Question:

Is it possible for someone to have bad luck? My grandmother used to say about such people that they have "no mazel." I am a college graduate, a learned man, but cannot seem to make any money.

Answer:

The word "mazel" is derived from the Hebrew verb "nozel" which means to flow. Mazel is the energy which flows to us from Above, and thus we often wish each other "mazel tov," which really means, "may you have a flow of positive energy."

Mazel affects every area in life. One person has mazel with his children, one has mazel in his looks, one has mazel when it comes to health, one when it comes to making money. One person has mazel with her friends, one with parents-in-law, one with great spouses for their children. One has mazel in his job, one has mazel with his bosses, one in making investments. One has mazel with her plants (a "green thumb") and one with scrabble. The list is endless.

So I'd like to make two points:

1) As you can see, mazel affects innumerable areas in a person's life. A person can have bad mazel in a specific area—but great mazel in many others. If someone has great mazel when it comes to making money, but no mazel at all with children, spouse, health, etc.—would you say he is a truly fortunate person, just because he is financially successful? What about a brilliant person in an unhappy marriage? The friendless millionaire? You write that you don't have good mazel financially—but do you have mazel in other areas of life? Nobody has good mazel in everything! And mazel with money is of far less importance than mazel in many other areas in life.

2) Mazel does not occur in a vacuum. We believe that every year on Rosh Hashanah it is decreed in Heaven what a person will earn during the coming year. That doesn't mean that a person can sit with folded hands a whole year, and say, "well, I don't have to do anything, whatever is decreed for me will just come to me." A check will not come flying in through the window. A person must make a "vessel" for the mazel, for G‑d's blessing. The vessel is hard (and honest) work, and prayer that the efforts be blessed from Above. Similarly, we pray that we should have good mazel with our children, while simultaneously working hard to be good parents and directing them in the proper way.

So instead of focusing on the presence or absence of mazel in your life, focus on doing whatever is in your ability to make a living. Make sure to pray properly three times a day to G‑d—the source of all wealth; and give charity to the best of your ability, because that is the best vehicle for financial mazel. And then stop worrying, because our livelihood is in G‑d's hands.

Chaya Sarah Silberberg serves as the rebbetzin of the Bais Chabad Torah Center in West Bloomfield, Michigan, since 1975. She also counsels, lectures, writes, and responds for Chabad.org’s Ask the Rabbi service.
Artwork by Sarah Kranz.
© Copyright, all rights reserved. If you enjoyed this article, we encourage you to distribute it further, provided that you comply with Chabad.org's copyright policy.
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Discussion (82)
May 31, 2016
God certainly punishes us in many different ways Unfortunately.
Anonymous
USA
May 31, 2016
Without love and passion there is only lonliness and madness (confusion)
tammy
May 29, 2016
I'd like to add a different dimension to this conversation. In much of my reading, I read that the important thing between people and G-d is the relationship. But how can one continue a relationship with someone when they feel as they are being abused by that being? I hope I'm not sounding like an upstart, but I am so deeply hurting that I am writing this wanting to be convinced that I am wrong, and that despite all my bad luck, G-d doesn't despise me. It just seems that every day, despite my accepting one bad thing, the next thing pops up. I think, and I'm not saying this facetiously, that a person has to be a malach to be able to hold onto a relationship with someone that does this to a person. A person has to be above human. Like I said, I'd like to be convinced that my thinking is wrong.
Anonymous
Teaneck
May 27, 2016
Shoshana in Jerusalem
Hello. I'm not asking this with any impudence intended, but I wonder if you have had to deal with successive bad things in your life. Once I was at the home of a person who has had a lot of good in her life and a lot of bad too. A guest of her's, a new ba'al teshuvah was waxing eloquent about how wonderful Judaism is and how Hashem takes care of everyone. I was at this person's house because something very bad was going on in my life at the time. This wise woman said to everyone: "It's easy to think like that when your life is good. But when it's bad, it's just not possible." I would like to hear people who have been beaten down time and time again and still be able to feel that Hashem takes care of them. I know there are people like that. I can't do it. I'd feel like I'm lying to myself if I did. I believe in G-d, but not that He cares one whit about me.
Anonymous
Teaneck
May 24, 2016
There is no ramdomness
It is obvious that if a person misses a plane that crashes it is because G-d wants him to live. Everything is directed from Above. One time I got a bus by "mistake" on the wrong side of the street. After a few stops I realized that I was going in the "wrong" direction, hopped off,and who did I see? Two women that I had shared a cab with the week before and payed them 10 shekel too little. I didn't know their names or addresses, had no way of paying them back, but H-shem (G-d), in His infinite goodness, directed me to the exact bus stop at the exact time they would be there, and I was able to return the money.

We look before we cross the street because we are commanded to take care of ourselves and also because it is forbidden to rely on miracles.

One answer to the suffering of the good in this temporary world is
that they receive their reward in the Next World, which is forever.
And the bad people, if they have done some good here, receive payment here and nothing There.

Shoshana
Jerusalem
May 23, 2016
I also believe that G-d exists. What I don't quite get, and what hurts me so much, is why He would do things to people that make people turn away from Him. If He wants us to daven to Him, to live life the way He wants us to, why would He confuse us so much? If we had a mother or father or sibling or friend who did that to us and hurt us so deeply, we'd walk away. And those are beings that we can see and talk to. I think that when people are very hurt, over and over again, they simply can't think like: "it's okay that this is happening. I just don't know the full story." Maybe once, maybe even twice, but not numerous times. At least that is the way that I am wired. I'm very glad for this blog.
Anonymous
Teaneck
May 20, 2016
My 2 cents..
I believe God exists. I beleive we are held accountable for the lives we live. This is my belief as a Jew. Yet, I do not believe God controls everything that happens in life. I beleive there is randomness. Why does a person miss a flight that crashes? We feel pain when a life ends and joy when a life begins. People that believe your life is predetermined still look both ways when they cross the street. God gave us different emotions to deal with how complex life can be. No one lives forever..why bad things happen to good people..and the questions we all have... I hope God will explain when our time here is done...
Phil Fairlawn
May 17, 2016
to Alan Greenberg
I am so sorry to hear about these tragedies in your life. I think you should find a really great rabbi, a true sage, with time and compassion, to answer your questions. The truth is that when you get to heaven everything will be so clear that you will not have any more questions at all, but you do need answers now, while you
are still in this world.
Have you ever seen a needle point tapestry, a kind of embroidery that women weave? If you view it from the back, it doesn't make any sense at all. Threads going in every direction, knots all over the place, ends cut off. One big confusion. But turn it over and you see a beautiful picture.

Life is sometimes very hard to understand because we don't see the
whole picture, we can't yet see the other side. And it's very painful. I hope you will find help and peace.
Shoshana
Jerusalem
April 8, 2016
To Alan: I am with you with those questions and they are in a sense torturing me. I so identify with your question about your mother. Probably this message thread is supposed to give support to people, but the only support I can give is to agree with your thinking. People try to tell me so many different ways to think, yet it always comes down to that bad people prosper and good people get punished. I wish that I could hear someone give me an answer that would resonate with me, but as of now, nothing helps.
Anonymous
Fairlawn
April 7, 2016
Luck, or lack of...
If I make it to heaven I have some important questions to ask,
1- Why would a woman like my mother sacrifice everything for her children, plus do all the right things in life get run down in the street and killed, like a dog.
2- Why would my brother who has never had an enemy, never drank, smoked or did drugs (Also a good father and Husband) get Cancer & die in one painful year... At age 51.
Alan Greenberg
Florida