Question:
The mezuzah on the doorpost of our home seems to act as a "beacon"
that signals and draws charity-seeking individuals to our door at all hours of
the evening and night. Many of these people seem to be demanding money, not
asking for it. (Frankly, we are considering removing the mezuzah from our front
door.) What do you advise?
Dr. A. G---, MD
Answer:
C'mon, doc, it can't be all that terrible! Of course, I can sympathize with
the sense of harassment you're experiencing. We have recently moved to a
densely Jewish neighborhood, and are now experiencing something similar. But we
try to look at the larger picture.
You probably know that Jewish people rank as the biggest donors to
philanthropic causes in North America. In times past, even the gentile beggar
knew there was more help available from the impoverished, oppressed Jew than
from his own kind. The ancient sages taught that a Jew is identified by three
qualities: Compassion, a sense of shame, and an urge to do kind deeds. If he
lacks one of these, they said, he is of questionable origin.
True, there are some rather obnoxious individuals that turn up occasionally.
However, the overwhelming majority are people with real issues. Most represent
some institution in Israel. Many have a family member in dire need of
assistance. We consider it a great privilege, as well as a noble tradition of
the Jewish people, to help such persons.
Rather than backtrack, taking down your mezuzah (which won't help anyway,
since they have your address by now!), I can make several suggestions:
o Always ask for a letter of introductions from an established
institution.
o Establish a nominal amount to give to the standard door-knocker.
If they start making demands, you can tell them -- and repeat to them -- “This
is what I give everybody. I have to be fair.” If they seem to be someone in
real, urgent need, increase somewhat. Some make that standard amount $18,
others $5, others $100. All according to what fits for you. You can always
increase later.
o Many people in your situation put a notice outside the door
stating hours for charity collectors. Ask someone to write a Hebrew version
for you as well.
I don't know if you have ever been in need of help, out on the street or
suffered one of those crises that brings financial ruin. I can tell you it ain't
fun. And the humiliation of receiving money from people begrudgingly is worse
than salt to the wounds.
Neither do those who have taken it upon themselves to raise funds for an
institution have an easy time. They are often teachers or even distinguished
rabbis. They must spend many months away from their families. The experience is
very trying and often degrading. You can try to make it a little easier on them
with a few simple gestures, such as offering a cup of coffee, use of your
washroom, or even with a simple smile and wishes of good luck.
Tzvi Freeman for Chabad.org
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