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Customs Related To A Bar Mitzvah

Customs Related To A Bar Mitzvah


(Taken From Sefer HaMinhagim (English translation) p. 173)

1.   One should endeavor to arrange that a bar-mitzvah should be called to the Reading of the Torah for his first aliyah on a Monday or Thursday morning, or at Minchah on Shabbos. 1

2.   The blessing shepatrini (Siddur, p. 70) is said without mentioning G‑d's Name. It can be said [at the Reading of the Torah] on a Monday, Thursday, or Rosh Chodesh, and not necessarily on Shabbos. 2

3.   According to the custom of Lubavitch, people get together after Shacharis, the relatives of the bar-mitzvah say a few words in honor of the happy occasion, and the bar-mitzvah repeats a maamar of Chassidus 3.  Those present are then offered cake and mashke, and a festive meal is held in the evening. 4

A directive of the Alter Rebbe; see Likkutei Dibburim, Vol. II, p. 533 [and in English translation: Vol. II, ch. 14, sec. 57], at length.
HaYom Yom, p. 112. See Rama, [Orach Chayim,] sec. 225; Shaar HaKollel, sec. 24.
It has become the custom of late for the bar-mitzvah to recite the maamar beginning with the words, Issa BeMidrash T[eh]illim, which was delivered [first by the Rebbe Rashab at his own bar-mitzvah in the year 5634 (1873), and then repeated (with additions) by the Previous Rebbe at his own bar-mitzvah] in 5653 (1893). The maamar is reprinted in Sefer HaMaamarim 5708.
Likkutei Dibburim, op. cit., sec. 58.

Cf. the following passage in Zohar Chadash, Parshas Bereishis: R. Shimon Bar Yochai invited the leading scholars of the Mishnah to partake of a great festive meal which he had arranged.... He was very happy..., because, [as he explained,] On this day a holy and exalted soul descended...into my son R. Elazar, and on this joyous occasion I shall experience supreme joy.

See also Magen Avraham on Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chayim 225:4: One is obliged to prepare a festive meal on the day that his son becomes bar-mitzvah as on the day that he is escorted to the marriage canopy.

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