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Elderly Widow Wishes to Remarry


Question:

My husband passed away several years ago. I am now in my seventies, and while I kind of learned to take care of myself, to do whatever is necessary without the help and support of my husband of fifty years, it seems that loneliness suddenly set in more than ever. Is it alright in Judaism to seek male companionship or marriage at my age? I'm not exactly desperate but life seems empty without a partner (not that I think it could ever be the same). I know it's especially difficult when the loss is a younger spouse, but don't we have to live our lives at any age?

Answer:

It must be very lonely for you after so many years of marriage to suddenly find yourself on your own. As a testament to how enjoyable and happy married life must have been for you, since your husband has passed away the loneliness has become even more intense as time has passed, and you are considering looking for a spouse.

There is nothing at all wrong with looking for a spouse at your age. You are still a person, and you still need love, companionship and emotional support. There are many couples who marry at an advanced age and enjoy a beautiful relationship in their golden years. By all means, search for a partner with whom you can spend your special years!

For more on the Jewish perspective on this issue, see Tying the Knot for the Second Time.

Wishing you much success,

Chana Weisberg for Chabad.org

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By Chana Weisberg   More articles...  |   RSS Listing of Newest Articles by this Author
Chana Weisberg is a writer, editor and lecturer. Her latest books include Tending the Garden: The Unique Gifts of the Jewish Woman and the best selling Divine Whispers on finding spirituality in daily life. She has served as the Dean of several women's educational institutes and lectures internationally on issues relating to women, faith, relationships and the Jewish soul.
All names of persons and locations or other identifying features referenced in these questions have been omitted or changed to preserve the anonymity of the questioners.

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Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: Oct 16, 2007
Friendship without marraige
I am past 70 and a widow for almost two years- While I know it is ideal to meet someone to become part of each others lives and hopefully marry--however but from the few men I've met at this point it seems like "the impossible dream. I did meet someone that I could be friends with and probably have a from time to time relationship but marraige is not in the picture for good reasons. It is tempting to enjoy whatever time we would spend together. Want to do whats right?
Posted By Anonymous, hallandale, Fl.

Posted: Oct 12, 2007
Living fully
What a lovely and compassionate response to a heartfelt question! Thank you so much for publishing the question and answer.
Posted By Jampa, West Hartford, CT



 


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