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I find it very difficult to be happy...


What an amazing and important question! It actually made me smile. :-) We all want to be happy and are always looking to discover this elusive happiness. Yet many of us are left still looking, never really discovering and maintaining our happiness.

The rabbis comment: "Who is wealthy?" And they answer, "One who is happy and content with his lot."

Being content and happy with ourselves and our circumstances means realizing that there is a Boss in our world who is running the world exactly as it is meant to be. Everything that happens to us, and any circumstances in our life, is exactly as it is meant to be and will foster the circumstances that we need for our growth and development. This realization is a tremendous comfort and can be a great source of happiness. Because when we realize and internalize that we don't lack anything, and the Infinite G‑d who is so full of compassion and wants only what is good for us is really running our world, we cannot help but feel true happiness.

It is also important not to focus on ourselves. If you are constantly evaluating whether or not you are happy, chances are you won't be. Far better is it to get busy with helping others--and there are so many others who can use so much help. Your concentration will no longer be on yourself and surprisingly the more you do for others, the more you will find yourself feeling so much happier.

One last idea: Act happy. Even if it is not real. Even if, at first, it feels like an act. The more you act happy, the more you might find that it has an impact on your frame of mind and you no longer are feeling unhappy, but your act has become you.

So smile. Laugh. Get busy helping others. And enjoy the beautiful life that your Creator has given you!

See also How Can I Be Happy?

Chana Weisberg for Chabad.org

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By Chana Weisberg   More articles...  |   RSS Listing of Newest Articles by this Author
Chana Weisberg is a writer, editor and lecturer. Her latest books include Tending the Garden: The Unique Gifts of the Jewish Woman and the best selling Divine Whispers on finding spirituality in daily life. She has served as the Dean of several women's educational institutes and lectures internationally on issues relating to women, faith, relationships and the Jewish soul.
All names of persons and locations or other identifying features referenced in these questions have been omitted or changed to preserve the anonymity of the questioners.

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Reader Comments
Latest Comments:
Posted: Sep 23, 2008
Dont worry... be Jewish! ;-)
Please if any of you seek therapy, seek a therapist who is also a Torah scholar. Especially marriage therapy, any kind of therapy! Look at the world, it is upside down, the last few years the divorce rate was higher than that of marriage. An average therapist with great intentions is often times just as confused as anyone else. This is why you must seek one who is also a Torah scholar, you may not even realize the difference in the session itself, but the results will likely be profoundly differant if the timeless wisdom of the Torah is driving them. All the best, be well, be happy!
Posted By Hadassah, Bal Harbour, FL

Posted: July 16, 2007
I Find It Very Difficult To Be Happy
You're NOT alone - I grew up in a family with too many issues that prevented them from experiencing any "real" happiness in their lives. I, myself, wanted to change that. Happiness was the ONLY thing I wanted in my life, but I learned some people can't be pleased, no matter what!

Do you suffer from depression, or do you just have a stressful life? Sometimes, medication is the answer, but I recommend therapy first. Whatever the case, I hope you find happiness soon.
Posted By Lisa, Providence, RI



 


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