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Chabad.org » Learning & Values » Questions & Answers » Jewish Ethics & Morality » Who Wants a Religion of No's?
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Who Wants a Religion of No's?


Don't drink and drive. Don't speed. Don't go through a red light. Don't drive the wrong direction on a one-way street. Don't talk on a hand-held electronic device, apply lipstick, argue with your spouse, or be involved in any other distracting activity while operating a motor vehicle. Don't. Don't. Don't… Every state has its own driver's manual which contains tens of pages of don'ts.

Why in heaven's name would any sane person willingly enter a vehicle which imposes so many restrictions on his freedom?! We live in a society which is fiercely proud of its freedoms – freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of privacy, freedom to choose your own cable company, etc. – freedoms which we will defend at all costs. Why, then, do we submit ourselves on a daily basis to such drastic restrictions?

While this question sounds highly philosophical, any five year old child will answer it in an instant: we drive cars because they take us where we want to go; and substantially quicker than any other method of transportation which is readily available. We willingly relinquish certain freedoms when doing so empowers us with a greater freedom and serves our greater goals.

Why do we submit ourselves on a daily basis to such drastic restrictions?On a deeper level, viewing all the abovementioned rules as "restrictions" is a tad childish. For in truth, every choice entails "restrictions." For example, if you choose to go shopping, that precludes you from mowing the lawn at that time. Would you call that a "restriction"? A real restriction is something which restricts your choice -- not something that you choose in order in order to achieve your goal. The person who chooses to drive is not focusing on the don'ts, rather he is focused on his choice – arriving safely at his destination. He isn't overwhelmed by the rules; he barely gives them a thought. Highlighting the don'ts demonstrates a lack of focus on the goal.

The same can be said of Judaism: Don't eat dairy together with meat. Don't wear a mixture of wool and linen. Don't turn on a light on Shabbat. Don't gossip… The Torah's "Manual for Driving through Life Safely & Spiritually" contains many more pages and rules than the booklet published by the DMV…

But one has a choice how to approach Torah. One can choose to see Torah as a collection of limiting rules intended to make one's life miserable, or one can be broadminded and recognize Torah for what it really is—the best vehicle of all. Actually, it is the only vehicle which is equipped to transport us to our desired destination—a life of spirituality, meaning, and connection to the Creator. Yes, driving this vehicle will restrict us from doing certain activities which will jeopardize the safety and success of our journey, as well as endanger other commuters and innocent pedestrians, but every choice means restricting those things which impedes the choice from being implemented!

The holy Chassidic master Rabbi Mendel of Kotzk once said, "Ideally one shouldn't abstain from sinning because sins are forbidden; rather, where does one find the time to sin?" When one is completely preoccupied with implementing the choice, then one doesn't have time to even ponder all the other options which this choice precluded.

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By Naftali Silberberg   More articles...  |   RSS Listing of Newest Articles by this Author
Rabbi Naftali Silberberg resides in Brooklyn, NY, with his wife Chaya Mushka and their three children.

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Latest Comments:
Posted: July 9, 2011
Also, remember, even Go-d changed...
He repented that He had been so angry He caused a flood, and so He put a rainbow in the sky as a sign. So, even Go-d changes. He said "sorry".
Posted By Karen Joyce Chaya Fradle Kleinman Bell, Riverside, CA, USA
via jewishriverside.com

Posted: July 9, 2011
Naftali, it is a matter of vocabulary.
You can accept that the Torah doesn't change, but you ALSO accept the Tanya, Mishna, and all other books that have sages who EXPLAIN how to use those rules in changing times. To me, this IS changing the Torah, but to you, it is not. We see the same occurrences, but use different words for the explanations. Once the Amaleks were decimated, we now USE the word Amalek to MEAN something else, with the law still there to kill them. It means any enemy of the Israelites. And, it could also mean a spiritual enemy. Then, the word "kill" would mean spiritually eliminate their ideas from your mind. So, it is all in the vocabulary. What will we be left with? What you have, Naftali. Mishna, and all other books which explain the Torah. In my definition of Torah, it is the first 5 books of the Bible. In your def., it may be the 1st 5 PLUS the other books by the sages. So, we may be talking about the same ideas, but with different words. The wording of the Bible is harsh and cruel. Sages explain.
Posted By Karen Joyce Chaya Fradle Kleinman Bell, Riverside, CA

Posted: July 8, 2011
Re: A Question of Belief
Indeed, Karen, it is a question of belief.

But let's for a moment examine the consequences of believing that the Torah can change over time. What then will we be left with?
Posted By Naftali Silberberg (author)

Posted: July 7, 2011
Rishe Deitsch, $ is the problem,
But, if I could have come, I would have loved to take you up on your offer. The interesting thing is that I think better over the computer than I do in person. In person, I stutter and can't think quickly with another person looking at me. Sometimes, after a face to face encounter, I think of answers a WEEK or more AFTER it is all over. I don't know why this is so. To Naftali, it boils down to this: IF WE BELIEVE that the Torah preceded the creation of the world, you are correct. If we don't believe that, then I am correct. It all depends on a person's point of view. Just because you believe it doesn't mean it is true in my mind. The strength of your belief is not, to me, proof. In fact, it is also not logical or correct, because of course the Torah has changed over time. Women now use sanitary pads and don't bleed on chairs, etc., so men don't have to find those chairs to be dirty. There are many such examples of changes, inc. in battle to kill women, kids & animals & take slaves.
Posted By Karen Joyce Chaya Fradle Kleinman Bell, Riverside, CA

Posted: July 6, 2011
the article is great; the comments, fascinating!
If both are willing, I'd lke to invite Karen Joyce and Rabbi Silberberg to my house to talk over some hot tea and apple cake. This cannot be done in email or in comments. Must be in person. Just my opinion...
Posted By Rishe Deitsch, Brooklyn, NY
via baischabad.com

Posted: July 6, 2011
who wants a religion of no's
good article. enjoyed reading.
Posted By dale goodman, w. bloom., mi.
via baischabad.com

Posted: May 18, 2011
To Karen Once Again:

The Rebbe explains why Torah is eternal, why its laws don't just expire or change, as you suggest they should. This is what he writes:

“There are two sorts of statutes: a) statutes that create life, and b) statutes created by life. Human laws are created by life so they vary from land to land according to circumstances. The A-lmighty's Torah is a G-dly law that creates life. G-d's Torah is the Torah of truth, the same in all places, at all times. Torah is eternal.”

In simple words this means: if a law is enacted in response to a certain circumstance, then when that circumstance changes, so should the law. But what if the law actually precedes the circumstance (as the Torah precedes the creation of the world)? What if the law is not in response to a specific situation, but is one of intrinsic worth? Can then the law change?
Posted By Naftali Silberberg (author), Brooklyn, NY

Posted: May 17, 2011
Naftali, here I have no clue. Understand?
No, I didn't even understand the answer. In this article, you said, "it is the only vehicle which is equipped to transport us to our desired destination—a life of spirituality, meaning, and connection to the Creator". There are different meanings of spirituality, just as there are different ways of showing love. If your definition of spirituality is to always obey to the letter of the law without thinking or feeling or having choices, then you are so correct. You must have a religion of "no's" in order to be spiritual. What would happen if all the NO's would be turned into positive commandments? Thou SHALL, thou MAY, thou COULD. In my college special ed classes for teaching, one class particularly awed me. It was about positive reinforcements vs negative. Along with that, we also learned how to voice requests in a positive way and re-structure negatives. Some things we Jews do is because of tradition. No logical explanation. It just IS. That's all.
Posted By Karen Joyce Chaya Fradle Kleinman Bell, Riverside, CA, USA

Posted: May 12, 2011
To Karen Again:
Karen, let's discuss this. I assume you took a few moments to try to digest what the Rebbe said. What do you think that was?
Posted By Naftali Silberberg (author), Brooklyn, NY

Posted: May 11, 2011
The Torah creates life (22nd day point)
Naftali, this further confuses me. Please explain your point with commoner's language. Thanks. I don't see how not sitting on a chair or whatever is the "no" law creates life.
Posted By Karen Joyce Chaya Fradle Kleinman Bell, Riverside, CA, USA



 


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