Heaven Exposed

"Your publication of these secret protocols of Heaven's business is outrageous and unacceptable. The notion that this revolution would tap into an essence-light rather than the standard glimmer in effect today is totally irrelevant to our discussion..."

It was an eerie feeling as the orbit of the planets suddenly swung into reverse. The moon was no longer receiving and reflecting light; as though sucked inwards, radiance flowed from the moon to the sun...

The classic case, Ministering Angels v. Moses, reported in the Talmud, has been public knowledge for millennia. Only recently, however, has the complete story come to light. Here is the entire dialogue as reconstructed from some of the declassified transcripts.

"Look," he tried. The poor angel was almost hysterical. "Our job was software. How were we supposed to know that the hardware was to be made from mud? We pleaded with The Engineer to find a more fitting encasement for such an ultimate being than this gray meat patty..."

"In direct consequence to the overwhelming success of the Maccabee project, the administration of Heaven Inc. has decided to provide yet another wondrous manifestation of the truth behind the cosmos, a.k.a. a miracle. We are presently accepting proposals..."

Events that unfolded in Shushan, the capitol of the Persian Empire, more than 25 centuries ago, had a traumatic effect on two angels assigned to the operation. Revealed here are transcripts of their sessions with their earthly therapist

Jay Schwartz spends his days creating worlds and their creatures in cyberspace, searching for meaning within them.

A sci-fi rendering of tefillin, its kabbalistic underpinnings, and its contemporary relevance.

"Beit!" cried the angry little Aleph to G-d. "Beit is a nice little house with a roof and walls to hold out the Infinite Light and a little door on one side to let a trickle in. And You chose that constipated, square-headed letter over me!"

What is a soul? I asked a couple of angels, a psychiatrist, a physicist and a guru, and this is what they told me...

Woman 1.0 was a harsh and judgmental version, not at all user-friendly. Her name was Lilith, with a personality as inflexible as a dry bone. Adam dumped that one fast. So woman was upgraded. The problem is, Adam wasn't...

I know this sounds kind of strange, but remember, physicality originally was just a way of tightly focusing in on divine energy. Making abstract ideas more “concrete,” so to speak. Only when the world descended and Adam had to leave the garden, did physicality come into the conflict with spirituality we see now.

You think I'm a dumb hamburger with eyeballs. You think I'm filled with self-serving, egoistic, narcissistic stuffings, a real me-bag. But I know a truth that you don't...

"Listen soul, how 'bout you just sleep this one out while I..."