The commandment of visiting the sick (bikkur cholim) is a very great good deed. Concerning this mitzvah, the Mishnah states that this is one of those actions of which one “eats of its fruits” in this world, and retains the “principle” in the next world.
According to certain opinions, this is a biblical mitzvah, based upon the verse “And you shall walk in His ways.”1 According to others (including Maimonides), it is a rabbinical commandment. Yet others maintain that this is a mitzvah which is a law that was handed down to Moses at Sinai (halachah le-Moshe mi-Sinai). Maimonides states that the commandment of visiting the sick is also an aspect of the mitzvah of “You shall love your fellow as yourself.”2
• There is no limit to the amount of times that one can fulfill this commandment, or to the level of its fulfillment, provided that one does not become too bothersome for the sick person. Most of the time, a short visit is preferable. One needs to take the status and the desires of the sick person into consideration.
• One should not limit visits to only those who are older and/or greater. Those who are younger or not as great also need visiting.
• If there are two sick patients, one who has many visitors and the other a few or none, one should preferably visit the latter person.
• Opinions vary as to whether one should visit a person whom he hates. According to some, he should avoid visiting, since it may appear as if he is rejoicing over the other’s illness. The best thing is to inform the sick person through a third party that you would like to visit him. If it is acceptable to the patient, you may visit him, for this may be the beginning of a peace process.
• No blessing is said when performing the commandment of visiting the sick.
• Not all patients are in a position to receive visitors. Under such circumstances, one should inquire of the relatives whether it is okay to visit; and even then, try to keep the visit short. It is also necessary to have a sixth sense and realize when one is overstaying. In a situation where a patient is not ready for visitors, visiting can still be accomplished by staying in the foyer or hallway, and helping out family members or saying Psalms on behalf of the person.
• Although most aspects of visiting the sick can be fulfilled only with a personal visit, if one is not able to do a personal visit, he can fulfill the mitzvah with a phone call.
• Enter the room of the sick person in a positive mood. Do not display any moods of sadness or melancholy, as this could affect the welfare of the patient.
• One should not bring bad tidings to a sick person.
• If one needs to fulfill the commandments of visiting the sick and consoling a mourner (nichum aveilim), and he is able only to do one or the other, then preference is given to the mitzvah of consoling a mourner.
• Rabbi Yeshayahu Horowitz, the holy Shaloh, writes that the commandment of visiting the sick involves three components: with one’s body (beguf), with one’s soul (benefesh) and with one’s money (bemamon).
| FOOTNOTES | |
| 1. | In Hebrew, vehalachta bidrachav. Deuteronomy 28:9. |
| 2. | In Hebrew, ve-ahavta le-rei’acha kamocha. Lev. 19:18. |
| 3. | Berachot 12b. |
I think your presence will be a big comfort to her and the family. Be there. Talk to her, reminisce about fun times you had together. Just be there. Let's hear good news.
Any response would be much appreciated.
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