Mourning Observances of Shiva and Sheloshim

The Five Stages of Mourning... The Origins of Shiva...

Who Is a Mourner? ... Which Relatives Are Mourned? ... Bride and Groom... Divorced Mate... Converts to Judaism... Sinners and Criminals... Cremated Dead... Suicides... Offspring of Intermarriage... Children Born Out of Wedlock... Instructions Not to Be Mourned...

When the Shiva Begins... Out-of-Town Burials... When the Burial is Delayed... Other Special Circumstances... The Duration of Shiva... Computing the 30-Day Sheloshim Period... The Sabbath During Shiva and Sheloshim... Holidays During the Shiva and Sheloshim...

Where a man has lived, there does his spirit continue to dwell. Ideally, then, shiva should be observed by all relatives in the house of the deceased...

Upon Return from the Cemetery... The Washing of Hands... The Condolence Meal... What is Eaten at the Meal of Condolence...

Candles in the House of Mourning... Covering the Mirrors... Additional Preparations....

The Significance of Communal Prayer in the House of Mourning... Gathering a Minyan... Changes In The Order Of The Service... Psalm 49...

Leaving the House During Shiva.... Sitting on a Low Seat...

One of the most fundamental laws of Jewish mourning is the prohibition of working and doing business during shiva...

The comfort of wearing leather shoes is denied the mourner during shiva, as on Yom Kippur...

With the shocking disruption of normal life caused by a death in the family, the standard forms of social interaction, its niceties and graces and minutiae of etiquette, are without significance....

Bathing for Pleasure... Cleanliness vs. Confort... The Use of Cosmetics... Haircutting & Nail Trimming...

The principle of avoiding pleasure during mourning also applies to the prohibition of laundering, or wearing freshly laundered clothes during shiva and sheloshim, while continuing to exercise normal standards of hygienic care and personal dignity...

The prohibition of marital relations during the Shiva

The Prohibition to Study Torah During Shiva

The Mitzvah to Visit the Mourner... The Purpose of the Shiva Condolence Call... When to Pay the Shiva Call... Etiquette at the House of Mourning... The Traditional Words of Condolence... Behavior During the Condolence Call...

For a clearer and deeper understanding of the dynamics of grief, the visitor should be familiar with the results of a psychological study of bereavement...

Calculating the End of Shiva... "A portion of the day is as a full day"... Walking Together...

Laws and Observances of the 30-Day Sheloshim Mourning Period... How the Sheloshim is Calculated... Haircutting... New Clothes... Attending Parties... Getting Married... Shiva and Sheloshim during Purim and Chanukah...