Is it Okay to be a Hypocrite? - Learning & Values

Question:

I feel funny wearing tzitzit when I drive to the synagogue on Shabbat. My rabbi says I shouldn't take them off, but it seems so hypocritical.

Answer:

We humans are full of paradox and contradiction - starting from the fact that our very existence is a marriage of opposites: a composite of body and soul, spirituality and corporeality. The paradox is further compounded because even our spiritual side is itself in schism: We have two souls, two personalities inside us: a transcendent Divine soul and an earthly animalistic soul. The rest…well, you're experiencing it right now.

So if we wouldn't make a move until every part of us is in synch, we would never get out of bed in the morning. We would be forever depressed about our hypocrisy. The key is realizing that we were created by G‑d with a paradoxical, contradictory nature, and that our mission is not to be perfect. Rather, we have to do the best we can at any given moment to ensure that our Divine soul is the one calling the shots. (And if it ever so happens that the animal soul calls the shots, as soon as we come to our senses we resolve to be stronger and we continue battling).

Truthfully, this is not called hypocrisy. It's called being inconsistent. And the only human being who is consistent is the one six feet under.

That is why your rabbi is right. Every mitzvah you do has value independent of what's happening with the rest of your life/body/family etc. Why should you refrain from doing something good just because you are not yet perfect?

Between me and you, the ultimate resolution of this issue is not to drive on Shabbat...G‑d willing, you will be ready to take that step eventually.

If the tzitzit bother you because of false impressions you feel you may be giving, you can tuck them into your pocket after services.

Take care, and it really is all about doing one more mitzvah.

By Moshe Goldman

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October 9, 2009

Tzitzit

Could about this about driving on Shabbat, can apply to just buying Kosher Meat when I have the money for? I havea big family and when the weather allowed we walk on Shabbat I wear tzitzit some times inside some times out, but since I dont make that much money we eat either fish or chicken from a regular store and once in a while we go to the Kosher market and buy kosher beef or chicken. the rest of our food is always kosher.

Anonymous
Dallas, tx

October 8, 2009

Tzitzit

This is an interesting question. I am a "liberal" Jew, yet I like to wear a Kippah all the time. My diet is vegetarian, and I do eat out in pure-Vegatarian (but not supervised) restaurants. (There is a large Indian / Buddhist / Hindu community in my area, and great 100% pure veg. restaurants to choose from.) I remove my kippah when eating there, because I don't want to mislead anyone.

However, I do wear it when driving to shul on Saturday. I figure it's not likely to mislead anyone, which is the real danger as I understand it. Nobody but you and G-d will see your Tzitzit when you drive (except maybe a trucker who pulls alongside you!)

Reuven
Sunnyvale, CA

October 8, 2009

being a hypocrit

the rebbi said doing a mitzvah is being the real you, but we obviously feel comfortable in this space suit.

benjamin terrell
jerusalem, is

October 8, 2009

Hypocrisy

A very good friend of mine was listening to me moan & groan about what a hypocrite I felt like. I believe the subject that day was that I cover my hair at shul or when I will be going to a Rabbi's house, but not usually in every day life. My friend (who covers her hair all of the time) told me a story which I believe came from the Rebbe (OBM) re a similar question from a gentleman who dressed very frum (pious) in his community, but wore regular business clothes in his profession. The man asked if he was being hypocritical & if he should stop wearing the frum clothing. The response was that he should continue to wear frum clothing. He was being a hypocrite only when he did NOT.
It's never wrong to do the right thing.
At our shul every Jew who walks in the door is created & treated equally. We are all observant while we are in shul, though I am striving to be observant all the time.

Anonymous
Tucson, Az

October 8, 2009

From everything I have read it should be hanging out. Every day when you say the Shema you say "and you shall SEE them" it specifically says see. How can you see them if they are tucked in?

Also in my opinion if you are questioning driving to shul on shabbat than the tzitzit are working and you should definitely leave them on.

Tuvia
CT

July 7, 2009

To tuck or not to tuck

Ah, the age old question. (snicker)

Sephardic tradition calls for the tuck, while Ashkenasic tradition calls for not tucking the tzittzit.

Hope this helps.

Of course, to each his own, as well. Thus, you all are correct.

However, the question at hand dealt with hypocrisy, or that is perceived hypocrisy.

May I add:

We all, as we see with the traditional differences, have things we do, and don't do. My question to the original questioner is this: Would it be better to forget all the laws or just one or two?

Do we not have short forms of the Amidah, do we not have prayers where we say to G-d, Please treat this as if I did it correctly?? Thus, your answer is, there is nothing hypocritical about being a flawed human being, that is how G-d created you. Would you say to G-d that he did it wrong?

Saul
Fort Collins, Colorado, USA

April 24, 2009

To Ariel

There are opinions in Halacha and Kabbalah that support both wearing them out and tucking them in. However, the average person today is not beyond needing the visual reminder that tzitzit provides, so that he refrains from evil and does good, and so it is proper to wear the tzitzit outside, where they are easily visible and effective.

See Likutei Sichos vol. 33 pg. 95 and on for an exhaustive treatment of the issue, and check out Do I need to let my tzitzit hang out?

Rabbi Moshe Goldman
Waterloo, ON

April 24, 2009

Tziitzit - tuck in or hang out?

I tuck in my Tzitzit regularly. However, I do see people wearing them out as well. Does it really matter as long as it is worn?

Ariel Dori
Flushing, NY

August 3, 2008

Thank you!

This makes me feel a lot better. I'm doing teshuva, and I always felt guilt in my mind when doing a sin. This saved me a lot of grief.

Anonymous