216. Not Doing - We Are All One

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Bringing Heaven Down to Earth

Based on letters and talks of the Rebbe, Rabbi M. M. Schneerson

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There are times when love can kill. There are times when you love someone so much, you cannot allow him to breathe. He must do things the way you understand is best for him—because you cannot bear that one you love so much should be in any way distant from the truth as you know it.

“After all,” you imagine, “I must do for him what I would have done for myself!”

But true love makes room for the one you love.

True love is best expressed not in what you do and what you say, but in what you do not do, and what you do not say.

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	Based on letters and talks of the Rebbe, Rabbi M. M. Schneerson More articles... \|
	From the wisdom of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, of righteous memory; words and condensation by Rabbi Tzvi Freeman. To order Rabbi Freeman’s book, Bringing Heaven Down to Earth, click here.

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Latest Comments:

Posted: Apr 1, 2011

Re: further on mussar

Yes, the mussar of these teachers is heavily influenced by chassidut. Dessler, especially, was very keen on study of Tanya.

Posted By Rabbi Tzvi Freeman
via mychabad.org

Posted: Apr 1, 2011

further on mussar

This is very strange. When i wrote the response above i did not put in the word Rebuke. How did it get there? The Mussar I am learning, thanks to Rabbis Wolbe, Dessler, and Fertig, as well as Alan Morinis (who has written three books recently on Mussar), has a very diferent take on Mussar. Rebuke is a minor part of it. Rabbi Shlomo Wolbe, z’’l, is widely considered the foremost contemporary Mussar master. Addressing an observant Jewish audience, he advocated that Mussar be taught to the Jewish community today in a different voice than was used in prior generations. Rav Wolbe focused on the positive. His book on parenting is titled Planting and Building in Childrearing. The key, he said, is to build the child's positive middot, rather than focus on pruning the inappropriate ones.
good shabbos,

Posted By Anonymous, Seattle, wa

Posted: Apr 1, 2011

Since

Since what you do and what you say comes from your "Core" and from your "Soul"-it has been my experience that those words have been misused by many in this society and in other groups who indicate that they are more honest than the actual society- Since spirituality can be expressed without words at special moments I...believe...we can successfully have a relationship where we aren't shoving our own opinions and desires down the throat of the other...I believe this can be done .

Posted By Miss Judith L Witten, Brockton, Ma/USA

Posted: Mar 31, 2011

Re: Mussar and Chassidut

When a student came to study with R. Schneur Zalman, the founder of Chabad, he had to be fluent in the Reishit Chochmah and other classic mussar works. Chassidut does not reject mussar--it builds upon it, going much further. Rather than meet evil head on, Chassidut provides a high road. Rather than fighting the shadow of darkness, Chassidut turns on the lights.

An upcoming article on the topic is in the works--in the "Building Blocks" section.

Posted By Rabbi Tzvi Freeman

Posted: Mar 24, 2011

Mussar and Chassidut

Dear Rabbi,
I love your Daily Dose and find so many times it resonates deeply with me. I am a serious student of Mussar/ Rebuke and only peripherally a student of Chassidut. The Chabad people I speak with seem to recoil when i mention Mussar. Yet, so much of what you write sounds just like what a Mussar sage would say. Can you give me any help in how to bridge the chasm that seems to exist?

Posted By Anonymous, Seattle, WA

Posted: Mar 2, 2011

comments from the author

Thank you Anonymous in Bay City for the correction! It's amazing how these things creep in and no one notices.

To the other Anonymous, the greatest act of love is when a man comes home on a rainy, muddy day and walks into the just-mopped kitchen in his muddy shoes—and his wife doesn't bite off his head.

Posted By Rabbi Tzvi Freeman (author)

Posted: Mar 2, 2011

do not do and do not say

I dont understand what the author is trying to say by loving someone and not doing or saying.

Posted By Anonymous

Posted: Mar 1, 2011

"Breathe"

Think the author meant to use the word "breathe" instead of "breath."

Actually, my grandmother hugged me so hard and long, one time, that I really could not breathe and I was probably seconds from passing out. I never allowed myself to let her get a death grip like that on me again.

Posted By Anonymous, Bay City, MI

Posted: Mar 1, 2011

Braided Love

Love should always respect the freedom and dignity of the human person. And helping someone we love (whether by a particular love or a general love) to recognize a truth, should itself be grounded in morally acceptable means, which is a truth unto itself. For love to be properly directed then it needs to be a braided love, the dominant strand being love of God from whom truth and goodness come and the other strand being love of a person or thing to whose good we are passionately devoted. Through faith and reason we can then know better what to do and what not to do and true love can prosper.

Posted By John, Gainesville, FL

Posted: Mar 1, 2011

Jazz Kisses

I remember warm summer nights and watching Jazz musicians play late at night and my eyes would be large and my mouth would be wide open and all I could say is "Wow" and the same with the others around me and he would come off stage and someone would tell him "We love you so much is there anything we can do for you?" and he would say "Throw Money" meaning stay away from me and just give me the money to support my music...I had a conversation with him later about it that's how I knew...Now this is the strange part- he didn't want anyones advise or anyone around as a companion-At the time I thought he was hurt but no actually not I had to grow to understand what he was talking about-Love is not in what you do it is in what you do not do-he was waiting-....Thank you for reading this

Posted By Miss Judith L Witten, Brockton, Ma/USA

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We Are All One


	Fragments


	True Love


	Two Ones


	In Trouble Together


	Which Is Greater


	Trust for Others


	Hypocrisy


	Not Doing


	Wanton Love


	Spontaneous


	Phase Two


	Ego Activist


	Tolerance


	Helping


	Words From the Heart

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