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First we request blessings for a good year, and then we ask for forgiveness. Shouldn’t it be in the reverse order?

Asking for Forgiveness

Asking for Forgiveness

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Asking for Forgiveness

First we request blessings for a good year, and then we ask for forgiveness. Shouldn’t it be in the reverse order?
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suzi orlando October 3, 2014

Forgive a monster? Dear Anonymous...Brooklyn NY (R.G.) I don't see how anyone can forgive such cultivated, intentional, and horrific behavior, I would like to understand what in this case, forgive means. I think it is a matter of semantics which is confusing me. If a Rabbi can please explain in this context, how, and more importantly, why, forgive. I have made changes intentionally due to our teachings. No longer do I carry grudges into my New Year. I can't forget, but I accept people as they are if I want them in my life. This is how I can forgive certain things, they aren't important enough, or intentional, or changed or hurt me enough, to divorce myself from those family, or friends. How/why forgive Nazis, radical Muslims who try and want to wipe us from this earth? Are we supposed to forgive a murderer, rapist,child molester? These all murder a person inside, if not outside. I want to be good, honest, and sincere. I can't truly forgive acts as these. Please help me to feel good as a Jew. I want G-D to love me, tell me how. Reply

Anonymous Brooklyn, ew York October 3, 2014

Forgive and Forgive a Monster ??????? Dear Rabbi: As a child of Holocaust Survivors and as a child who lost her parents as a young girl....I married someone who mistreated me....on every level....I am a professional woman(medical field) and my ex is also in the medical field. I was married for 25 years and had three children and life was nothing than monstrous and
painful-my ex is a Batterer who battered me emotionally and physically....I tried to protect my darling children as best as I was able.....it was difficult since I had several operations......at the end.....I entered the hospital many times over with a difficult diagnosis....it turned out that my ex husband was poisoning me and I developed a life threatening illness to which I am suffering to this day....there is not contact from my ex ...to me to me or my children.......forgiveness for this painful insanity ? Why ? For what ? to whom> R.G. Reply

Jill Andersen Las Vegas, NV September 13, 2013

Asking for forgiveness What if there are important people in your life who you need to seek clearance with yet you truly feel that you are the one who has been wronged, offended and unloved and in reality they should be asking for your forgiveness? Should you be the one to ask for forgiveness to try and clear the situation for the new year? This sounds selfish and self centered as I write it. My life is more peaceful on one hand not having contact with these family members; however how can one be at peace when they are not at peace with their own family. Any thoughts out there?

Thank you Rabbi Weinstein! I like your analogy to explain why we celebrate Rosh Hashana before Yom Kippor. It is so true in life that a little kindness and encouragement go along way. We can obliterate one another with our words so easily and really crush the will and esteem of that person. We need to understand that just because we have done wrong it doesn't make us intrinsically bad or worthless.
Thank you for your words. Reply

cindy graham los angeles, ca via chabadla.org September 9, 2013

asking for forgiveness thank you for the audio regarding forgiveness . it made me feel really good. forgiveness is the way. I really learned something from your lesson. thank you I feel much better now. when you forgive a lot is lifted off of you... thank you again Reply

Liat Knopf brooklyn, NY October 27, 2012

asking for forgivness To N. conway, London----
The question you asked-it all depends on your back ground, if you're Jewish I say visit you local Rabbi, and if your christian I say-ask your priest....there's no short answer to your question....it can be sometimes a whole process...good luck! Reply

Deborah White waterdown, ON September 13, 2011

asking for forgiveness, U.K.2008 You must first ask yourself. Then you must ask G-d. The answer you seek is immediate and there is no such thing. G-d moves in mysterious ways. Live every day as a new one, not just Rosh Hashanah andYom Kippur. Start your day with a smile and a happy attitude, and be thankful you have this day.
I wake with a smile and so many people have asked my how I can always be happy..the answer is simple..Things could always be worse.... Reply

Liat Knopf brooklyn, NY September 16, 2010

Turning To Hashem i think that even though we dont go and ask the person we insulted or did did something wrong-we should right away turn to G-d and ask Him to forgive us-and help us do better...even if we are in the middle of an argument for example and you feel like making an out-burst ask G-d to help you not to, and to get over the test-right then and there, and you'll see G-d's help a lot!
Thank you so much, i love listening to all of your speeches over and over again! Reply

suzi clark orlando, florida September 19, 2009

NEW YEAR FIRST, THEN ASK FORGIVENESS Thank you Rabbi. This brought tears, as well as understanding.

This year is more difficult for me than some others. I am more emotional than usual. (and I am usually pretty emotional)

It is so good to be able to read, and hear familiar voices, words, and lessons. This is very appreciated.

I wish you the New Year you would wish yourself. Reply

Yvonne Knowles Rio Rancho, NM September 18, 2009

Repentance Our G-d is a Father of love and mercy. He is ready to forgive us the instant we ask forgiveness for any wrong doing. We should be repenting daily throughout the year, as we become aware of our wrongs and omissions. As you repent you will feel peace in your soul, and be more able to move forward in your spiritual progress. Reply

pauli cymet beverly hills, ca usa September 30, 2008

When to askfor forgiveness Forgive yourself first. THEN ask for G-d's foregiveness. Just do all your repentance before YK, and do a few mitzvahs too-as good deeds are important. We don't always make or have the time, for good deeds, so do them ritualistically at this time of year. Once you start, you will want to do more. I know. And accept that you are imperfect, acknowledge that first, and then simply try to be in a better place in your actions at this time next year. Your questioning shows you are a good person, a person who cares about your behavior, so don't be too hard on yourself, and remember that He is a loving G-d & wants you to be happy!
L'shana tova to you and yours..wishing you health, happiness, prosperity, and inner peace from beautiful beverly hills, regards, pauli Reply

Aryeh Weinstein September 28, 2008

When to ask The time is, now! If one is truly remorseful then he should wait for nothing. Forgiveness can be achieved at any moment.
Have a happy New Year! Reply

N. Conway London, UK September 27, 2008

asking for forgiveness Please let me know when is it the right time to ask for forgiveness. Does the period start with Erev Rosh Hashanah? Are there specific words to say? Do we just ask "please forgive me" or can we say more? I have said sorry last week, do I need to confirm it in this period?
I am very anxious to get rid of this heavy weight. What if I dont get an answer? I have to do it by text message on the mobile. Reply

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